1. Okay, I’ll go. I mentioned earlier that any of Twitter’s employees that were smart should grab that severance package and get the hell out, since Elmo has decided everyone has to perform at superhuman levels. So guess what? They did.

    I’m firmly convinced Musk is an idiot. I mean, I went through the dot-com implosion, and I thought I’d seen every form of mismanagement possible. But this dude is in a class all by himself. He’s basically set $44 billion on fire and is asking people where he can find marshmallows.

    Twitter’s Musk says most-valuable employees can stay remote amid signs of revolt


    The revision came as several Twitter employees said they were surprised by the large number of their colleagues who were opting for the severance package. The employees spoke on the condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to discuss internal company developments.


    There was no word on why Musk revised his return-to-office order. One Twitter staff member said the numbers of employees seeking to leave had alarmed Twitter’s managers, who had formed “war rooms” to determine which employees should be asked to stay on.

    Resignations and departures were already taking a toll on Twitter’s service, employees said. “Breakages are already happening slowly and accumulating,” one said. “If you want to export your tweets, do it now.”

    Recent departures have left multiple critical systems down to two, one or even zero engineers, according to a former employee who was familiar with the situation and spoke on the condition of anonymity out of fear of retaliation.

    Hate speech and other abuse was also likely to spike, employees said. Most of Twitter’s Trust and Safety team, consisting of up to 40 people, was expected to resign.

    • The thing about every large organization is there are so many points of failure that keep popping up if you don’t have transition plans for when people leave, and they happen in the most unexpected places.

      Wipe out all that institutional knowledge in one fell swoop and you will never get it back. None of those people will lift a finger to deal with any of it.

      Somebody at HR will be the only one who is certified to file state of California unemployment compliance forms. Gone. Somebody in legal will be critical for meeting quarterly EU regulations on overseas offices for people with disabilities, so suddenly those offices get shut down.

      Somebody in facilities management is the only one who knows how to update the parking garage passcode system, and suddenly everyone’s car is trapped.

      There’s a reason why those people had jobs, and none of them will help now.

      • Yeah, I’ve talked before about the meme of Phyllis in Accounting. You can fire the entire C suite, every VP, and the majority of the managers, and most companies will hum right along without any loss of productivity. But if Phyllis takes the day off, the company grinds to a halt.

        There’s always a Phyllis. Always.

  2. My wife had big surgery on her ankle today and we just got back. She had a chronic issue and various things got moved and trimmed and shuffled, and the long term look is good, but the recovery period will go through New Years.

    I meant to run the old joke by the surgeon “after this is done will she be able to play the piano?” but I didn’t get around to it.

  3. Seeing as this is my type of nothing NOT I might as well say this publicly…I’m pretty vexed.

    @loveshaq has helped me with business cards TWICE. The second time was to ENLARGE some of the print. He helped and I submitted them to be printed AGAIN. I picked them up today…AFTER A TWO MONTH DELAY…and the LARGER print is actually SMALLER. It turns out that they printed the image smaller than the business card and fit it to size with a matte border around the edges in order to save money. They look like crap for that but also because it is only legible to those with 20/5 vision ffs.

    I paid in advance…over 100$…

    I’m not the type to make a fuss and I just take my losses like a gentleman so I’m not going to toss up a bad review or complain or anything…but now I have to bug @loveshaq again to do stuff so if anyone else wants to leave a bad review LOL


    …knock yourselves out.


    • I think you’re the third person this week that I know who got screwed over on business cards where the company decided a ridiculously teeny font was a great idea despite the order and proof being for legible business cards.

      • i was not aware of it being a common thing, but holy shit!

        @splinterrip once shared with me a conversation he had with facebook customer service and…ok, fine…I’m not exactly an avid reader but I have read most of the books people claim to be important and I’m…idk…an “affable” troll? I’ll leave that for others to decide…anyway…it was the very best piece of literature I’ve ever read and, to even my higher-than-thou judgement, probably the best piece of trolling I’ve ever seen.

        Ever since, I’ve felt the great work had already been done and there is no point complaining to a company about anything anymore. The standard has been set and pretty much impossible to live up to.

        Just take my fucking money and fuck off you assholes!

      • I’ve actually wondered about making myself some business cards. I don’t really need them, but it kind of feels weird not to have them. I’ve had them at every job for years. Every so often I see someone whip one out and I get a little wistful.

        • bryanlsplinter
          Florida Man/Political Guru
          DeadSplinter Regional Ambassador
          "nah...I'm just passing through"
          DeadSplinter Regional Ambassador
          opinion politique extraordinaire
          DeadSplinter Regional Ambassador

    • Dude?  I’m here for you.  Hopefully it wasn’t something I fucked up but I can fix whatever is going wrong & even yell at some printers for you!  I’m good at being an asshole as many of you may have figured out by now!

  4. Pretty sure my old highschool buddy still works for Twitter. I kind of forgot, because he has worked for YouTube etc. and I lose track. He was at the YouTube building that had an active shooter a few years ago but then started working for Twitter. I am in a messenger group with him and another friend from highschool and I mentioned shit was fucked up at Twitter, forgetting he worked there until my wife reminded me. He never commented. I’m tempted to directly ask him if he is still there and what he thinks. He has always been a technocrat and it’s been hard to judge how he feels about the decline of crypto etc.

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