
Welcome to this week’s installment of C U Next Tuesday, where I scoop a few turds out of humanity’s toilet and list the reasons to flush them.
I wanted to learn a little more about the figures leading us to our glorious rapture the brink of war, and exactly what motivation they might have to do so.
Cuntretary of Defense: Mark Esper
Yeah these word-plays are getting tough.
This motherfucker is a real grade A cunt and he was totally off my radar until the past couple weeks. I’m sure there is more to him but I’m real fixated on one aspect of his cuntery.
- He spent years as the top lobbyist for (and currently owns stock in) Raytheon – yeah, that Raytheon – and now sits in a position to make that company and himself a lot of fucking money off of decimating the entire Middle East (and only Liz Warren wanted to call him out on this in his confirmation hearing)
- Thanks to an agreement with the Office of Government Ethics, he’d recused himself from matters that would affect Raytheon financially, but that expired in November and he refused to extend it.
- “Esper refused when Warren demanded that he commit to not working for any defense contractor for four years after leaving his Pentagon job and that he extend a two-year ethics commitment due to expire in November that forces him to avoid decisions involving Raytheon.”
- Knowing his history, and that the recusal extension was not on the table, still 90 fucking Senators voted to confirm him last year. Presidential hopefuls were among the only ones to vote against him, except Sanders, who did not vote.
- Esper has contradicted Trump in our recent crisis, saying he has seen no evidence of an “imminent” threat from Iran. However, of course, just because he hasn’t seen the evidence doesn’t mean Trump isn’t right. So he’s continuing to stan for Trump, essentially saying, “there is no evidence that Trump is telling the truth, but I have a good feeling about this.” So he’s either the Defense Secretary who hasn’t seen intel that Trump has, or everyone’s lying and confused.
Cuntstache: John Bolton
Yosemicunt Sam Yocuntime Sam Yosemite Cunt Cuntsemite Sam Cuntsemicunt Scunt (yep that’s the one) has been a cunt in the public eye for decades.
A quick timeline of Bolton’s cuntery leading up to the Trump era:
- In the ’70s, Bolton enlisted in the Maryland National Guard, specifically to avoid being drafted in to Vietnam. He used that fact once to prove he is not pro-war.
- As an assistant attorney general in the Reagan administration, he tried to block the investigation into Iran-Contra by saying independent counsels were unconstitutional.
- As Under Secretary of State in GWB’s administration, he struck a deal to keep the International Criminal Court from prosecuting Americans under international law.
- He publicly and falsely claimed the Cuba was developing nukes.
- He also later pushed the same lie about Iraq, long after it was discredited and people were moving away from it. In fact, he was basically #1 Iraq liar. As in, if you believe Republicans, the person who tricked GWB.
- For a short time in the Bush administration, he served as the ambassador to the UN, despite wanting to actively destroy it. But he was a recess appointment because the Senate would not confirm him.
- In the meantime before Trump, he spent time building up his conservative support hanging around some right wing think tanks.
- Generally, he has advocated for just bombing the fuck out of everyone, disregarded the House calling him to testify in the impeachment hearings so he can save it all for his juicy book (and saying he will go if the Senate calls him, knowing they won’t), and is generally the fucking worst.
- He is one of the people controlling Trump who is trying to invoke the fucking end of the world, as well, which I think gets overlooked.
John Bolton will not save us. Remember that list every time you think you want him to testify; his only goal is to destabilize the world order, and if he testifies against Trump, it’s to that end.
Evangelicunt: Mike Pompeo
He hardly needs an introduction, but I wanted to dive deeper into his past cuntery.
- As is stated in every story ever written about him, he is a West Point graduate. People question how he can be such a lying liar while upholding his West Point code of ethics (to which I’d ask, do you think all those white military men you graduate abide by those principles?)
- His pre-politics career involved being an indirect profiteer of war by starting an aerospace largely funded by the Kochs.
- And when he ran for Congress, he himself was funded by the Kochs as their top donation recipient that year.
- In Congress, he was about as shitty as any Republican gets, including sponsoring a bill in 2015 called the Born Alive Abortion Survivors Act., which doesn’t sound all that insidious if you are a believer of conservative propaganda, but it is. It wasn’t the first of its kind, and it isn’t the last.
- A couple years ago, people were spreading the lie that he served in the Gulf War. The lie started on Wikipedia, but is still suspiciously part of the story he allows those around him to tell.
- We know the more recent history, so I won’t go into it, but I will link to this article about him being part of the coalition trying to bring the end of the world and what Iran has to do with that.
Add your own cunts below, big and small!
See last week’s inaugural installment here.
Kudos on this…
re: Bolton’s mustache close up. That is some nightmare fuel, beyond what is necessary!
Yeah, that one of Bolton’s mustache is the stuff that’ll haunt you in the late, sleepless hours of night.
And that’s not the even in the top 10 worst things about him!
I just want everyone to live in my nightmares!
Well thanks for that!
That thing looks like it has a life of its own.
John Bolton = Cap’n Cunt
A few more bullet points:
– “Kentucky Republican Senator Rand Paul described Mr Bolton in an op-ed as ‘hell-bent on repeating virtually every foreign policy mistake the US has made in the last 15 years’.”
– “He ruffled feathers in the second Bush administration where he initially worked as US Department of State under-secretary for arms control. Mr Bolton was accused of trying to force out two intelligence analysts who disagreed with him, and of seeking to undermine his boss, Colin Powell.”
– “He once derided careerists at the US foreign ministry as having been ‘schooled in accommodation and compromise with foreigners, rather than aggressive advocacy of US interests’.”
– “As he briefly weighed his own run for the US presidency in 2016, Mr Bolton called in an op-ed for Iran to be bombed.”
– “And in an op-ed for the Wall Street Journal published shortly before being appointed by Mr Trump, he set out the case for a pre-emptive strike on North Korea.”
Ugh I can’t believe I missed that pun!!!
Excellent additions.
Excellent weekly feature! I wish the rapture would go ahead and happen so we can get rid of these salvationist
dipshits. I’m not religious but I would pray every day if it would actually help bring it on.
Recent addition I’d missed – Mike Pompeo skipped a hearing on the Soleimani airstrike today! https://thehill.com/policy/defense/477997-house-chairman-pompeo-wont-testify-at-iran-hearing-tuesday
I constantly think that I wish I believed in hell because then it feels like there would be some justice somewhere in the universe.
Yeah, it never stops sucking that none of these bastards will ever get what they deserve.
Repuglicunts.
ooooh, ooooh….can I suggest Bill Barr? He’s got more skeletons in his closet than a Dahmer ice box! He also might be more dangerous than all these cunts!
Oooh yeah that’s a good one. He probably needs his very own. I just like compiling things into lists. Not new or weird information, but just a handy list of why someone sucks.
“In the ’70s, Bolton enlisted in the Maryland National Guard, specifically to avoid being drafted in to Vietnam.”
In all honesty, this is the ONE thing that I have absolutely zero problems with Bolton doing (as long as he actually DID his time with the MD Nat’l Guard.
You can say I’m biased & i’m fine with that.**
But joining up to avoid getting drafted is 10000000000% more honorable than claiming “bone spurs” like’ol DonnyDumbass did, fleeing to Canada (like my bragging HS English teacher), or malingering in college ‘cuz your parents were rich (see again: DonnyDumbass)
On EVERY.SINGLE.OTHER.THING about Bolton, though, YEAAAAAH—FUUUUUUUUUUCK that guy!!!🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
**full disclosure, my dad & his brother both enlisted in the Navy & served their time there to avoid the Vietnam draft, too. Dad was on the USS Forestall when it returned to duty after the Disaster, and my uncle was on the USS Bonhomie Richard–which ended up patrolling for months longer off the coast of Vietnam, after the disaster happened (the Zippo was headed to Asia to relieve the Bonnie Dick of it’s patrolling duty, when the ordinance went off on the deck & the disaster happened).
I’d like to know how easy or difficult it was to join the guard to avoid the draft. Was it an option for Black men, impoverished white men? If so then I’m okay with it too. But, if you had to have pull then it’s still bullshit. I’ve been googling it but can’t find anything. I have been told that it was almost impossible for Black men to get Conscientious Observer status. But I can’t find any stats on this either.
Also, just adding these re Pompeo’s Dominionist/”Let’s bring on the Rapture!” leanings:
https://washingtonmonthly.com/2020/01/07/pompeo-aligns-u-s-foreign-policy-with-the-christian-zionists/
https://newrepublic.com/article/156166/pence-pompeo-evanglicals-war-iran-christian-zionism
https://merip.org/2019/08/countering-christian-zionism-in-the-age-of-trump/
Also, don’t forget drunk-wrinkled-shirt himself (Aka Bannon), who’s also always involved in the neo-religious “fourth turning” bullshittery *somewhere*:
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/steve-bannon-apocalypse_n_5898f02ee4b040613138a951
https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/special-features/in-depth/middle-eastern-prophecy-is-trump-a-reincarnated-king-cyrus-destined-to-herald-the-end-of-days/news-story/c16a683e55eb3b98f6704f432370a398
https://www.forbes.com/sites/stratfor/2017/08/17/the-apocalyptic-vision-of-stephen-k-bannon/
I think Mulvaney is one of these too.
Not sure ’bout how hard it was for poor & minority folks, but here’s an… interesting… story on how “difficult” a time Dubya had trying to get into the TX guard🧐🧐🧐
https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/politics/campaigns/wh2000/stories/bush072899.htm
I found this which addresses the CO issue, it seems like it was difficult for Black men. But got easier as the war went on If only because the Civil Rights movement was growing. Interesting read.
https://www.crmvet.org/comm/draft.htm
“The well-to-do kids had enough sense to get on the waiting list,” Martin said. “Some [applicants] thought they could just walk in the door and sign up.”
This is what I thought. If only because they knew there were other options, and had people counselling them on how to avoid combat. Legal but not necessarily ethical.
Good point! I guess I just hate a warmongering monster who avoids the hard part of war.
“As in, if you believe Republicans, the person who tricked GWB.”
This *also* conveniently lets GWB’s cronies avoid the fact that CrummyRummy & DarthFuckingCheney were pushing HARD for war,because there was profiteering to be done & BANK to be made by warmongering, and poor little Halliburton & KBR had to make money *somewhere*🤨😡🤬
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Halliburton
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/KBR_(company)
YEP. And that’s why I don’t “believe” Republicans. I believe they made up the idea that the elected officials (including Congress members) were all kept out in the cold and dumb to this just to save face. And it fucking worked.
We know they were in on and it, as you say, we know why.
Also, just adding these re Pompeo’s Dominionist/”Let’s bring on the Rapture!” leanings:
https://washingtonmonthly.com/2020/01/07/pompeo-aligns-u-s-foreign-policy-with-the-christian-zionists/
https://newrepublic.com/article/156166/pence-pompeo-evanglicals-war-iran-christian-zionism
https://merip.org/2019/08/countering-christian-zionism-in-the-age-of-trump/
Annnnnnd drunk-wrinkled-shirt himself (Aka Bannon), who’s also always involved in the neo-religious “fourth turning” bullshittery *somewhere*:
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/steve-bannon-apocalypse_n_5898f02ee4b040613138a951
https://www.adelaidenow.com.au/news/special-features/in-depth/middle-eastern-prophecy-is-trump-a-reincarnated-king-cyrus-destined-to-herald-the-end-of-days/news-story/c16a683e55eb3b98f6704f432370a398
https://www.forbes.com/sites/stratfor/2017/08/17/the-apocalyptic-vision-of-stephen-k-bannon/
…that one may have come through twice but I liked it both times & those are some good links you got there
…& between Barr & Bannon (I know we used up Bolton already) I think maybe there ought to be a B-list C U Next Tuesday post sometime?
As we can also list BatBoyStephen (ratBastardStephen?) Miller on that “B” list…
I’m good with that😉😈
We can do every Tuesday until I die and we’ll never run out!
There are so many cunts to go around.