You’re late for work, a meeting, picking the kids up from school. Or you’ve just committed a number of crimes. But your blood sugar drops and you’ve just gotta get your grub on.
Where are you stopping, Deadsplinters? I do like the coffee at Mickey D’s.
But if I’m already in trouble I may as well get doughnuts. Give me a couple of glazed. What the hell, make it a dozen.
Well then, I need to break than down:
In any case, I would already be fully caffeinated and have a travel mug along for the ride.
@Elliecoo LOL, the pharmacy is a great idea. If you planned ahead and brought them you could eat your chips during the chase.
Cape Cod’s sea salt and vinegar chips are proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
Salt and Vinegar = best chip flavor!
No need to stop. The smart move is tell Ubereats or some other soulless delivery company that you need a driver to pull up alongside you on the Interstate and throw the food through your open window at 100 mph.
100% this will not be the first time someone has asked for this.
Excellent idea!
Just gonna bitch here: Meetings are completely out of control. I keep having them scheduled at 1 pm. No, assholes, that means I gotta cut my lunch short to be back at the computer. Fuck that shit.
Last week my phone buzzes while I’m in line at PetSmart. 1 pm meeting in 15 minutes. No time for lunch, no time to buy anything to bring back, gotta haul ass back to my desk. As soon as the woman in front of me buys 86 cans of cat food.
I’m always working nights and weekends and I DO NOT keep a rigid schedule during the day. If I need an extra half-hour for lunch to buy shit for my damn turtle, I take it.
Back on topic: My hurried lunch go-to is The Fresh Market. I sprint through, buy a sandwich or a salad, and typically they’ll open registers if more than two people are in line. However, if the gendarmes are in hot pursuit, I’ll grab my sandwich and head out the back door. No need to pay, I’m a criminal. Steal another car, get on my way. Getting stuck in a drive-through line is a rookie mistake.
No, I haven’t thought about this. Why do you ask?
@bryanlsplinter The turkey and cherry jam sandwich from Fresh Market is delicious! And you do seem to have given some thought.
I had to add my hours to my Outlook calendar because people were constantly scheduling meetings during my lunch or after I left for the day :/ And I’m hourly so I don’t get paid to stay or get to take a long lunch.
Considering doing the same. I can’t tell you how many times somebody sends me something at 11:55 and says they need it right away. Not to mention the phone ringing at 12:10. It’s weird — it was never a problem in the office. But work from home seems to mean that everybody’s on call 24/7. I’ve had people call me at 5:30 saying, well, your “available” indicator was on in Zoom so I thought it would be okay. No, dipshit, I don’t remember to turn that stupid thing off because I have actual work to do, and I left my computer on for updates.
AAARRRRGGGGHHHH
Drive-through coffee booth on my way outta Dodge, and then head for the hills.
@MemeWeaver Coffee was my first thought too.
I rarely eat McDonald’s, but gimme a bacon egg and cheese biscuit if it’s looking like my last meal!
@MegMegMcGee I get the coffee sometimes when I’m out running errands. They do have fast drive though service. If you tried to do this at Burger King you’d be there far too long.
If I’m on the lam it’s Benedetti’s, Home of the Rocket, because their sammiches will sustain you for DAYS, plus the neighborhood is perfect for hiding out, the cops will be so distracted by other perps on their radar.
https://benedettisdeli.com/
@Sedevilc Just googled Benedetti’s. I’m gonna do my crimes in your area. The menu looks great and they deliver so you can meet them in a parking lot somewhere and skip the drive thru altogether.
Sometimes I like to drink a beer while I’m driving. It drives my wife nuts.
I can see her point but, if you’re already in trouble an open container charge isn’t really going to make things worse. You can swing by the package store on your chase.
I walk in with 5 beers in my hand. She looks at me all disgusted. I look at my hand and exclaim “Fuckers shorted me a beer!”
It’s something of a routine.
LOL
…sadly this isn’t my own idea…it’s borrowed from a book (which incidentally is kind of great) but the point is I think they almost had a good idea but failed to really commit to it to the degree required to make it work
…it’s called the getaway lunch…you knock off some place opposite a half decent restaurant/diner then stroll across the street before the cops show up & have a really long lunch right in the window where you can watch the circus unfold…then (& apparently this is key) having been at least mildly awkward to deal with & stayed at your table longer than is usual for the establishment in question…you tip generously
…the logic is apparently that the staff will certainly remember you less than fondly but because of the tip they’ll be more likely to talk about how you were there a long time & when you left since that will have made an impression…rather than when you arrived which is a handy detail for them to be a bit vague about
…it’s certainly more civilized than the approach from the movie inside man…although I guess for that one it’s important to have brought your food along for the ride in advance?
I like this idea, and it sort of meshes with @Elliecoo’s French restaurant thought. Also the book sounds good, going to look for it.
I would like a personal pan pizza from the Pizza Hut of my childhood (early 90s), plus their breadsticks + ranch and a coke in one of those old red cups. Not practical for a high speed chase perhaps, but *shrug*
It might be messy, but they’ll hose you off when you get to jail anyway.
If I’m fleeing the authorities, I’m probably heading into the wilderness. Maybe if I get lucky I’ll pass some berries I can grab on my way.
@Lochaber I’m not saying that’s why I keep a Lifestraw in my glovebox. But I’m not not saying it. 😂
huh. I think that’s a pretty good idea in general. If I had a car, I might reconsider my slightly irrational dislike of lifestraws…
I think of them as a piece of emergency equippment.
I’m stopping for a box of kolaches to snack on during my hot pursuit.
Fuck me, now I want kolaches.
I haven’t had lol aches in years. Now I want some too.