DeadSplinter Up! All Night: Teacher, Teacher

It’s Tucciday and also World Teacher Day – Did you have a favorite teacher when you were in school? I loved my 8th grade English teacher – Mrs. Patterson – she introduced me to The Lord of the Rings and pretended to be really interested and impressed with my very intense essay about Star Wars – the book that was just a retelling of the movie. She made you want to read and introduced us to some of my favorite books – Dune and Watership Down.

Also – a fun fact…

Today is the day with the most birthdays.

On any given day about 750,000 Americans celebrate their birthday, but today, more than 960,000 will celebrate their special day. The reason October 5th is such a popular birthdate because the length of the average pregnancy is 274 days which would make the day of conception New Year’s Eve.

Okay – not New Years Eve – but the morning after…

As always – thanks for your support of Deadsplinter and DUAN!



  1. i didnt get on very well with most of my teachers….the only exceptions were my science teachers (coz they are all fucking crazy…and do shit like set the floor on fire or accidentally on purpose blow shit up) and my p.e teachers (coz…uhh…well…being allowed to run around like a loon and do flips and shit generally made me easier to manage i think)


  2. I hated school and spent as little time there as possible. Most of my teachers were disinterested or creeps.

    Fela Kuti – Teachers Don’t Teach Me Nonsense


    Tito Puente – Teach me Tonight



  3. I went to Catholic school and my grammar school teachers were nuns, which created in me a psycho-sexual kink where the very sight of a nun in habit causes a mixture of terror and arousal.  There was one young sister who was especially hot and mean.  To this day, if someone shows me a picture of Mary Tyler Moore as a nun from the Elvis movie CHANGE OF HABIT, I break into a sweat.  And by the way if you wanna know about that nun’s habit in my closet, it was for a damn Halloween costume, OK?




    • To this day I cannot eat green beans because a nun made me eat them until I barfed in preschool!  I too fear nuns but don’t have the other part but could be another reason I hate religion.  I had a teacher I hated that went on to become mayor of Honolulu, I had a math teacher that was also my water polo coach that could hit you with a chalk eraser from anywhere in the room for talking without you having a chance to react (I often left math in a cloud of chalk dust), and I had a sub that was a little person in Time Bandits.  He was probably about the most fun teacher I can remember.

      • i got kicked out of bible class in my catholic school


        i was a yeah but why kid…

        why….is not a popular question in religion turns out

        everything just is and thems the rules

        (ETA) how? isnt apreciated either

        • I was raised Catholic, and repeatedly kicked out of my Sunday School classes for asking the wrong questions.

          I probably spent almost as much time sitting in the hallway as I did in the classrooms…

      • I have heard hints that my kindergarten teacher wasn’t fond of me, and I don’t remember enough to know if that’s true. But I do have a clear memory of walking up to her desk one day and throwing up right in front of her, so maybe those things are related.

      • I don’t know what it was, but I never had to deal with a mean nun.  They were all very nice.

        Now, math teachers on the other hand are invariably terrible humans.  The worst one I had would scream at us every day, with spit flying out of his mouth and often hitting kids 3 and 4 rows back.  None of us could understand why he was in that job.

        My favorite teacher was my 5th grade teacher.  He was smart and funny and also made a point of teaching us actual living skills.  I knew how to manage a bank account and balance a checkbook years before I ever had a real account of my own.  He had a classroom economy where almost anything could be bought or sold for the fake money he made.  There was a bank, with two girls in the class who handled all of the transactions and the statements.  Woe be unto you if you bounced a check.  He took us to professional basketball games and even an end-of-school camping trip.  That guy was the best.

        Supertramp – School


  4. A twee two-fer with another Belle & Sebastian:

    Belle and Sebastian, “We Rule the School”

    And imagine if your teacher sounded like Sarah Nixey:

    🎵 Destroy your record collection; it’s for your own protection. 🎵 

    Black Box Recorder, “School Song”

    • Oops, I went for school themes and not teachers. Here’s an excuse to slip in another two-fer.

      This Hamilton, ON-based duo is terrific live and I miss them so. Jeremy Greenspan (no relation to Alan, AFAIK) is a wonderfully dedicated performer who brings it and makes a gig well worth your tired feet at the end of the evening.

      Junior Boys, “Teach Me How to Fight”

      This is the best I could do, but I’m on a Christopher Guest kick lately, and so here’s a bit of Waiting for Guffman featuring Parker Posey singing “Teacher’s Pet” 

      • Aw…RIP Fred Willard.

        I have a friend who could be a Christopher Guest character. Before she entered the corporate world, she had a steady gig as a vet tech/groomer at a high-end practice (Best in Show). On the side, she was the lead singer in a band (A Mighty Wind). She was also an actor (still is) in community theater (Waiting For Guffman), working her way up until she got a SAG card and attended a few awards ceremonies (For Your Consideration).

        She reliably assures me that Christopher Guest is sugar-coating how insane all of this is in real life. I kind of know this because I have other friends whose parents breed dogs, one so embedded into the Westminster Kennel Club that she is now a judge at Westminster, so I am a frequent attendee and am privy to much more than the average spectator. Back to that first friend, I used to open my apartment to her so she could stage tryouts and readings, because we have a fairly large open living area, and some people who would like to pursue a life in the theater can be–eccentric, let’s say.

        But I love them all. My curiosity about my fellow bipeds is boundless.

        • Indeed. This former theatre kid who still regularly attends dance or yoga with jobbing actors and performers can confirm. There was a…handsiness…to rehearsal time that is hopefully not acceptable today.

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