Food You Can Eat: Celebrity Sunday Matinee: Brooklyn Beckham’s English Breakfast Sandwiches

Ever since I read that New York Magazine article about nepo-babies I’ve been a little obsessed. I feel like I have known about nepotism since I was a baby myself, but now I notice it everywhere, in media, literature, Hollywood, corporate America…I think back to all the connected interns at my company, and my alma mater’s constant crowing about how students’ experiences were so rewarding that they decided to send their children. I, personally, would not advertise the proliferation of legacy admissions if I were working in the PR office of a top-tier school but I guess I was not cut out for a career in academic fundraising.

So let’s turn our attention to—I wouldn’t say hugely successful, necessarily [edit: late-breaking development: he earned £5 million, approximately US$6 million, just last year alone, via various endorsement deals]—Brooklyn Beckham, oldest son of Posh and Becks; godson of Elton John, David Furnish, and Elizabeth Hurley; and spouse of wealthy heiress-actress Nicola Peltz. In his short 24 years on the planet he has lived several lives: aspiring footballer like Dear Old Dad, fashion model, photographer, and now much-ridiculed “celebrity chef.” [Another addition: his cooking shows are watched by up to 5 million people and he has an astonishing 15 million Instagram followers—I could not be more untethered from popular culture.] Let’s take these in turn.

As a teen he “played in the Arsenal F.C. Academy, but he left in 2015 after not receiving a scholarship to remain with the academy.” Scholarship. Does that mean something different? Economic hardship drove him out? Or was it something else?

When both your parents are hot and famous you would naturally turn to modeling, which Brooklyn did, and he appeared in Vogue China, Dazed (Korea), and their US equivalent, T: The New York Times Style Magazine.

Having been fashion-photographed, he turned his hand to that and when he was 16 he did a shoot for Burberry. Apparently in the fashion-photog world it’s still talked about today for what a gross devaluation it was for professional practitioners of the trade. Undaunted by the jealousy-driven and completely unfounded criticism of his peers, he enrolled in the photography program at the New School right here in New York City, and promptly dropped out his first year. Aside from time at the Arsenal Academy and his brief stay at the New School I can find no other references to any formal schooling whatsoever. Which kind of surprises me because maybe Oxbridge might have turned him down but I’m sure my university and dozens more would have taken him and let him coast along for four or six or more years, no hard labor necessary. Photography was his passion, though, and in 2017 he released a captioned photography book called What I See, the leaked images from which spawned an entire sub-genre of Twitter ridicule. 

A true Renaissance man, it was only natural that he display his gifts in the kitchen. He created his own online video series, Cookin with Brooklyn, which, it has been revealed, employed 62 professionals and cost $100,000 per episode. Despite this, each episode managed to feature a creation more comment-worthy than Sandra Lee’s Kwanzaa cake, so he does have a gift for keeping his name in the public consciousness.

Then he married Nicola (among the wedding guests was Gordon Ramsay, who as far as I know has never spoken publicly about Brooklyn’s chef-ing talents, or lack thereof), and he seems to have gone to ground at present, but there was recently a video of him making a truffled tagliatelle that uses so much of that delicious fungus that each serving would cost hundreds of dollars to make.

Speaking of truffles, I rooted around like a wild boar searching for the quintessential Brooklyn Beckham recipe to share, and this came out on top. This was made on an episode of the Today show and I didn’t understand why something so simple generated so much hostility. Three reasons apparently. One, he claims he grew up watching his great-grandmother make these sandwiches, so it’s an old family recipe. I mean it might be. Two, and this is from British critics, you don’t butter the bread, but this is basically a sausage McMuffin with bacon and ketchup, so is butter really necessary? And three, during the episode he thought he was done but the Today host reminded him that he said something about drizzling ketchup, did he forget that?

Brooklyn Beckham’s English Breakfast Sandwiches

1 teaspoon olive oil

4 slices English bacon

4 country sausages

2 eggs

1 teaspoon salt

1 teaspoon freshly ground black pepper

4 slices soft white bread

ketchup, to serve

Add the olive oil to a cast-iron skillet set over medium heat, place the bacon in the pan and cook 3 to 5 minutes, or until crispy on both sides. Remove bacon and place onto a paper towel-lined plate to remove excess grease.

Then add sausages into the same pan, searing evenly on all sides. After about 2 to 3 minutes, slice them in half while keeping the two sides attached and cook the inside until crispy. Remove from pan and place onto plate with the bacon.

Add 2 eggs into the same skillet and season with salt and pepper. These should cook quickly with the existing oil in the pan.

Assemble all ingredients on top of the bread to make two sandwiches, drizzle with ketchup, cut in half and serve.