Food You Can Eat: Cousin Matthew’s Moules Frites (Mussels with Fries)

Image via lesfoodies.com

I decided to sneak this in to FYCE before shellfish season is over. It’s true what the old adage says, you shouldn’t really eat shellfish in months that don’t have an “r” in them.

This might as well be (if it isn’t officially) the national dish of Belgium. My version is a very simple recipe, and very tasty, but kind of a pain in the gluteus maximus for the yield you get. This recipe only serves 2, and you still might leave a little hungry. Still, I have great fondness for this recipe because for a very brief period The Better Half and I worked within walking distance of each other and he asked me what I wanted for my birthday. “Well, a big check, obviously, but failing that, my birthday is on a Friday so take me out to lunch and we’ll arrange to take the afternoon off and we can walk around. I’m sure I’ll think of something.” 

The restaurant specialized in mussels, “Moules” was in the name, but it lasted less than The Better Half’s tenure near my office (he was ascending the corporate ladder with the speed of a gazelle, leaping from one job to another) but I always remember that lunch.

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1 lb. bag of frozen French fries. Difficulty #1: If you don’t make your own it’s tough to find the long, slightly thicker ones that are served in Belgian restaurants. I know, Cousin Mattie the Hobbling Gourmet should get over himself, but they should be thicker than what you get at McDonald’s and longer, but not like steak fries. Imagine a McDonald’s fry twice the girth and twice as long. But really any French fries will do.

2 lbs. mussels. Difficulty #2: The meat you’re going to get out of 2 lbs. of mussels will not exactly make you feel bloated. Plus, get the mussels as fresh as you can, and throw away any that may have partially opened. 

1/2-stick butter (4 tbsp.)

1 head garlic, diced

1 medium onion, diced

Some dry white wine

2 parts very eggy mayonnaise or preferably a slightly herbed aioli. You can make this yourself

1 part mustard. I’d go with mild, actually. You’ll see why the mayo and mustard instructions are so vague.

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On a baking sheet, cook the French fries as the package tells you. This shouldn’t take long.  Don’t let them burn.

Meanwhile, in a big skillet (and you’re going to have to judge for yourself if you can pull this off in a skillet or whether you need a pot) melt the butter on medium heat and add the garlic and onion. Stir so that nothing burns. Do this for about 2 minutes. Then pour in about 1/4 of the bottle of dry white wine you’re dipped into, reduce heat to a simmer, and let this go for about for about 5 minutes. 

At this point in the game your French fries are probably done. Take them out and let them watch you from the top of the stove. 

Add the mussels to the simmering skillet and cover them. This is why you should judge how big your skillet is. Mussels take practically no time to cook, and if you overcook them they’re like eating pieces of elastic bands. Stir them a little (open, stir, cover, repeat once or twice) and at about the five-minute mark (maybe just a tiny bit longer, better safe than sorry) you’ll see them opening up. Discard any that don’t open. Turn off the heat and move it to the burner that’s not being hogged by the French fries baking sheet.

Mix 2 parts mayo and 1 part mustard so you make enough for your fries to dip in. If you make a little too much, whatever, it makes for a good sandwich spread. 

On two large plates divide the mussels and put on one side. Pour the sauce from the skillet over them. On the other side, place the French fries. Either divide the mayo/mustard into individual small bowls or, if you’re feeling extra-communal, one large bowl to share with your companion. This is a little gross because you will dip a fry, bite, then dip again, but you be the judge of your intimacy comfort level with your companion. 

If you’re scaling up and making this for guests you’ll have to use a big pot for all the mussels you’ll need and give everyone their own mayo/mustard bowl for the fries.

As you can guess, an excellent accompaniment to this is slices from a warm, crusty baguette slathered in butter. Yes, bread and potatoes, but you can use the bread to sop up the sauce you’ve poured over the mussels.

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10 Comments

  1. I really like Moules Frites. A local French bistro does an excellent job with them, plus they serve some very dry baguette slices to sop up any remaining sauce. I’ve not made them at home, because the carnivore will not eat them; it feels like too much effort for me, knowing I will be making a separate meal for him. However, you make it seem easily doable, as long as there is a steak under the broiler for others.

    So are you cooking? Standing? Being waited on hand and foot? How goes the recuperation, as far as cooking?

    • The new cast member, The Physical Therapist, just left a few minutes ago. Now I feel fairly guilty because apparently I’m MUCH more mobile than most of the patients he sees, and he remarked, “Well, it looks like you can get in and out of bed and you answered the door yourself…” I said, “Yes, we haven’t gotten to the ‘Whatever Happened to Baby Jane’ stage yet but if this doesn’t clear up soon I’ll be served my pet parakeet for dinner.” He had no idea what I was talking about. So I was given a 3X/day exercise regimen to follow and—even I’m sick of talking about this. 
       
      I have not been waited on hand and foot but I have been giving rudimentary cooking lessons to The Better Half. Last night we made toasted ham and Swiss cheese sandwiches (not Croque Monsieur’s, because I didn’t feel like making the béchamel sauce) and we made some homemade apple sauce, and the night before I showed him how to work the countertop grill we have and we made cheeseburgers served open-faced on oven-toasted brioche with a blue cheese topping I devised (BURP!). The longest journey begins with the smallest step. A year from now he’s going to be an FYCE contributor and he’s going to be submitting all kinds of outlandish recipes, just you wait. “Here’s something that Cousin Mattie taught me to make, a stuffed pork loin that’s very simple to make but requires three hours of prep and oven time. You may have to search a little bit to find the cheese that we use. We like to accompany this with homemade Spätzle which can be done easily…”
       
      I should really be vlogging this, but my “athleisurewear” consists of an old college T-shirt, a pair of tartan plaid boxer shorts (I have several pairs of these in various patterns), a robe that predates the first Clinton administration, and my swollen, heavily bandaged left leg that may cause distress and alarm to the viewer. 
       
       

        • I can just imagine how his recipes would go. 
           
          “Serves 1. 1 40-lb. bag of premium kibble. Place in a large bowl, the size of a bathtub I am sometimes stood in for the amusement of the perverse two-legged “useful idiots” I am stuck with. Top with the contents of that heating unit they like to play with so much. Serve and eat immediately.”
           
          “Midday snack. A useful idiot will take you into the great outdoors. Consider the sidewalks your salad bar. Feel free to wolf down anything that smells appealing, especially if it comes in a wrapper. This will be wrestled out of your mouth after great effort but that’s part of the appeal.”

    • I meant to really reply that seafood, including shellfish, is actually very easy and quick to make, if you don’t fuck around with elaborate sauces like I sometimes do. Even stews like chowders can be somewhat easily made in small batches using just a saucepan on a stovetop, and the seafood component, as long as it’s fresh and not potentially lethal, is the least of your worries. 

  2. I love Frites Belgique!  Especially after a night of boozing.
    Only bad thing is the garlic mayo gives me wicked heartburn as both ingredients do give me heartburn (damn getting older.)

  3. yum!
    i love mussels…i havent been able to cook them in the shell since the incident tho…
    (the incident being me watching them open and squee and deciding they were talking to me…then i couldnt eat em no mo…lol….sometimes my brain does a little too much thinking)
    i should probably try it again sometime…ive probably gotten over that flight of fancy by now….maybe

    • If you buy the flash-frozen kind, someone else already made them do the dying part😉
      (This, plus the scrubby-bit, AND the sand is why I’ve only used the freezeded ones😉)

      • lol tbh…its not something that normally bothers me….just really did that time
        i gave them feefees as i was cooking and put meself off…
        that said…im edging ever closer to a vegetarian diet…so maybe its for the best..

  4. Good for posting this. On top of tasting great, mussels are very widely farmed with eco-friendly methods. So it is very common for stores to carry top quality ones which are extremely fresh and don’t need extensive cleaning and sorting like in the old days. More and more this is true for clams too. Farmed salmon and shrimp can be more of a crapshoot, unfortunately, but it’s getting easier to find responsibly farmed options.

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