Y’all! I am so bored. I am so, so bored. BH and I have been living together ever since we met at the Chicago World’s Fair (the Columbian Exposition) in 1893, and working collegially from home for the last decade (listen, folks, this is no joke. When Cornpop…oh, right sorry.) Anyway, I went freelance and I was not raised by Puerto Ricans and where does the Jewish thing come in? And then BH took a job where they didn’t want him anywhere near HQ, real estate’s too expensive in Silicon Valley, and they needed a bridge from the West Coast “the Asia markets wouldn’t be too grueling” and Europe, which Rome, for example, is six hours ahead of us. That was the idea. Soon enough BH became global troubleshooter/ambassador, and the alarm never stops going off and the phone calls from all over the globe never cease.
What does this have to do with pancakes? Absolutely nothing, actually. This is a Scandinavian recipe that I made recently. Oh, I remember. The topic is boredom, and what, in my diminished state, I do to alleviate it. As long as BH is around to pull out the pots and pans I need I can still lean on the counters on either side of the oven and get along pretty well.
- 2 teaspoons baking soda
- 2 teaspoons baking powder
- 1 egg
- 1 cup low-fat milk [No. Full fat]
- 1⁄2 cup light sour cream [No. Full fat]
- 1 teaspoon mustard [Grey Poupon or something like that if you have it. Not something like Gulden’s yellow mustard. The Great Grey Poupon Shortage seems to have abated, if it ever really existed, so just like toilet paper you can now find it again pretty easily]
- 1 teaspoon horseradish cream
- 2 tablespoons chives, chopped (plus extra, to garnish)
- black pepper
- 200g smoked salmon, slices [This is 7 oz. I use more like 10, but the Faithful Hound loves salmon so my measurements are clouded]
DIRECTIONS
- Combine sifted flour with baking soda and baking powder. In a separate bowl, lightly beat egg and add milk. Make a well in the centre of the flour mixture and pour in egg and milk. Stir with a whisk until smooth and thick. [HERESY ALERT! Just use Bisquick. That’s why God created it.]
- Spoon a tablespoon of mixture into a lightly greased, non-stick frying pan. Cook over a medium heat for 3 minutes, until bubbles appear on the surface. Turn and cook for 1 minute. Repeat with remaining batter and set aside to cool completely.
- Combine sour cream, mustard and horseradish. Stir in chives and season with pepper. Spoon onto cooled pancakes and top with slices of smoked salmon. Garnish with extra chives and serve.
Smoked Salmon, one of the few things I would refuse to surrender even with high blood pressure (not that I have high BP, but that’s how much I enjoy smoked salmon.)
BH went through a phase years ago where every morning for breakfast, post-gym, he wanted a toasted bagel with cream cheese, smoked salmon, and capers. This went on for months and I was running the kitchen.
We don’t consume nearly as much salmon now, but we had some (quite a lot, actually) and I knew this existed, so I looked it up and found this recipe. It’s so simple but I’m so depleted sometimes that I just drag out the box of Bisquick. It never lets me down. I’m surprised there’s not a national holiday devoted to it.
The first time I went on a cruise, the deli counter had amazing toasted bagels with cream cheese and a slab of smoked salmon.
Don’t get me wrong, the rest of their sandwich options were middling at best. The bagels were only amazing because the staff put a slab of cream cheese and a massive amount of smoked salmon on them.
Did I ever tell you [NO. NO. NO NO NO] that two of my siblings and their spouses went on one of those cruises to nowhere? You just sort of cruise around in the Atlantic until you get to international waters and then everything becomes duty-free and they can open up the onboard casino(s.) My siblings do not share my fondness for the grape and the grain, and the chance to try their luck at a gaming table, but they do like to eat. I don’t know which cruise line this was but they had several buffets and seated meals and the food never stopped. My sister (one of the passengers) told me afterward, “It was incredible. It was like you couldn’t sleep. It’d be 1 in the morning and you’d remember that the make-your-own sundae dessert bar was open and most of the ship would be there. And then at 5 am you’d be at the omelet station along with everyone else. Still, it was fun…”
My mother and I did a lot of cruises about a decade ago, it was a fun way to do a easily managed trip.
But yes – it’s like oh ok dinner at 6:30 then oh hey ice cream at 9pm with a movie on the deck and omg Midnight Chocolate Buffet!
They’re fun, I would cruise more except I got out of the habit of it when Covid hit and then I wanted to do things like go to Hawaii for 6 days, and then repeat the same trip the following year because it was so nice and enjoyable.
IMO everyone who lives in New York City is at least Jewish-adjacent.
This also sounds great. I’m pretty sure I’ve had something akin to this before, but then, I have Jewish family so of course I’ve had a smoked salmon dish (or 37).
I deploy Yiddishisms in such quantity and quality that I’ve had Jewish people ask me if I’m Jewish. I once had to explain to someone what the word “schlep” meant. I was at a party and described an unpleasant retail experience and called the employees gonifs. People had no idea what I was talking about. I called a frenemy of mine a schnorrer and I was met with blank stares.
I don’t understand this. These people all live in New York. They’re not picking anything up by osmosis? Sitting shiva? Davening? Saying the Kaddish? Anyone? Bueller? I have even served as a Shabbos goy, or really the building’s Hanukkah goy. We set up a special Hanukkah menorah every year and when I was asked to do this working from home was very rare, so I was around and said, “Yes, I can do it.” Mind you, I’m about as Jewish as Barbara Bush, RIP.
So, I looked this up, tracked the NWS sunset times, ran down to the lobby, said the prayer from the first night when you light the shamesh, and kept the electric “candles” burning throughout the 8 days. I figured it was a good deed that would earn me points.
You and Elvis, Shabbos goys!
Don’t make me post this again:
YES.
If you have a friend that fishes in WA. you WILL be given smoked salmon by the end of summer when they have full freezers and are smoking the pinks and chums. We usually just mix it with cream cheese and serve it with crackers but this looks good. The start of salmon season was almost exactly a month ago & one of the best is having a good year & amazingly is pretty cheap here for a change at some stores (not at Pike Place Market though).
https://thecordovatimes.com/2024/05/21/strong-copper-river-forecast-buoys-expectations-for-first-fish-party/
This is giving me 2010’s vibes when blini were a short lived hype. Don’t get me wrong. I love smoke salmon and cream cheese on pretty much any form of gluten.
Anyone who has worked as a retail buyer in the garment district has a fluent vocabulary as well.That nosh looks yummy.
For example, “Oy vey, a maven would never wear that schmatte – it is tight in the tuches.”
Now I’ve got to go to a meeting and kvetch about the chutzpah of a coworker.
Exactly, bubbeleh!
My ultra-exclusive, theoretically public, dog run was incredibly Jewish. Matzo brei recipes. Seder recipes. Israeli politics. New York political candidates: are they good for the Jews? When we weren’t talking about our dogs that’s what we were talking about on our benches while people, including me, took turns throwing the absolutely filthy and slobberous tennis balls around. They were all very good liberals and would sometimes bring sign-up sheets for different referenda or to get a preferred candidate on the ballot, but there were certain political positions, even on the Left, that were definitely not kosher.
I miss them all so much. Half of them are probably dead by now. Their dogs all certainly must be.
I love smoked salmon. Unfortunately, I would eat all the smoked salmon long before I could make any fussy little pancakes to put it on.
But if you wanna make this, I’m in.