Food You Can Eat: Poppy Seed Torte

18/2/21 butcherbakertoiletrymaker 19
Just like June Cleaver used to make.

First things first:  As I have stated previously, I am a Cheap BastardTM.  This means that there are times when I get tired of seeing a particular ingredient in the kitchen that has sat for way too long without getting used.  Relax, I’m not talking about dairy or meat or anything else that might kill me.  It’s usually along the lines of spices or some other long storage ingredient, like all the damned flours that Mrs. Butcher bought and then stopped using.  In this particular case, it was the poppy seeds.  Mrs. Butcher bought them at some point for who-knows-what, and they’ve sat in the spice rack ever since.  Well, I got sick of looking at those poppy seeds right around the time I was thinking about what kind of dessert I wanted to make, and here we are.

A caveat before we get started:  This dessert is straight out of Cousin Matt’s wheelhouse—a 50’s type dessert.  You’ll see what I mean when we get to the ingredient list, but trust me this is not even close to something that civilized, 21st Century Citizens of the World would consider fashionable today.  In fact, it is a dessert that my Grandma made and passed on to my mother.  I loved this dessert as a kid, so we’ll see if I still like it today, or if—like my entertainment choices of 40 years ago—it has lost its luster.  Also, I had a little less poppy seeds than what the recipe calls for so mine will look different from yours.

Here’s what you’ll need:

1 Cup Graham Cracker Crumbs

½ Cup Butter, melted

1 Cup Flour

½ Cup Nuts, chopped

1 Pkg. Knox Gelatin

¼ Cup Water

1 ½ Cups Milk

1 ½ Cups Sugar

2 tsp. Corn Starch

½ Cup Poppy Seeds

½ tsp. Salt

5 Eggs, separated

½ tsp. Cream of Tartar

½ tsp. Vanilla

First, I’m going to start with a little detour.  I didn’t have any chopped nuts and didn’t want to buy any (CBTM), so I got some of the whole almonds we had in the kitchen, put them in a freezer bag (because it’s thicker), and then pounded the living daylights out of them with a meat tenderizer (because I’m also lazy as hell and chopping the nuts with a knife would have taken too long). 

I pretended this was Donald Trump’s face.

So, if you want to do this because you, too, only have whole nuts in your kitchen, it’s simple, quick and cathartic.  Now, mix together the graham cracker crumbs, melted butter, flour and nuts.  Then spread along the bottom and up the sides of a glass casserole dish.

Be gentle, but firm. It doesn’t spread easily.

Bake the crust in a 350-degree oven for about 15 minutes, then let it cool on a rack.

To make the filling, start by dissolving the gelatin in a bowl with the water and setting aside.  It will set while you’re doing other things.

In a small saucepan over medium heat, whisk the milk together with 1 cup of sugar, the corn starch, poppy seeds and salt.  Before the mixture gets too warm, take a minute to beat the egg yolks in their bowl—when the time comes to use them, you’ll have to be quick.  Continue whisking the milk mixture until it thickens a bit and just starts to boil.  You don’t want a rolling boil because this isn’t a double boiler so you don’t want to risk burning the milk.

Now comes the time to temper the egg yolks so they don’t immediately cook when you add them to the saucepan.  Using a small ladle (like the kind you use for serving gravy), pour two ladle’s worth into the yolks while beating the yolks with a fork so that everything incorporates well and the temperature of the yolks is raised.  Then, slowly pour the tempered yolks back into the milk mixture while whisking constantly.  Let the custard boil for about another minute, then turn off the heat, add the dissolved gelatin, mix thoroughly, and pour the custard into a large bowl to cool.

You should remember this from the Moussaka.
I can read the poppy seeds to tell your fortune.

While the custard is cooling, whip your egg whites with the cream of tartar until stiff.  Then add the vanilla and the remaining ½ cup of sugar, pouring the sugar in a steady stream.  Beat for a couple minutes more.

Those whites are standing up on their own–that’s what you want.

After you’ve done the dishes and folded the laundry, the custard should be cool enough to stick your finger into.  Gently fold the egg whites into the custard until fully incorporated.  Then pour the filling into the crust, and place—uncovered—in the refrigerator to chill and set.  You can cover it after it has set, but if you fail to heed my directions and cover it first then you’ll have half of your filling sticking to the plastic wrap when you’re ready to serve it.  Don’t come crying to me.

Be careful to get the custard from the bottom of the bowl incorporated. It likes to pool.
No, you don’t bake this. Just put it in the fridge.

(4 hours later)

So, it’s not exactly how I remember it—it’s a little eggier than I recall—but that was 40 years ago, and the shortage of poppy seeds might also have something to do with it.  That being said, it still holds up.  Which is good, because I’d hate to have to choke this down over the course of the next week.  What, you think I would just throw it out if I didn’t like it?  My Cheap BastardnessTM knows no bounds.

Should you make it?  Sure—but particularly if you’re Cousin Matt.

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19 Comments

  2. It looks tasty, that feature image of the slice is cookbook worthy! I own a similarly aging jar of poppy seeds…but it feels like a lot of work? I’ll take your Cheap Bastard™ and raise it by a Lazy Cook™.

  4. You have summoned the Kraken.
     
    Yes, it is I, Cousin Matthew. I would totally make this and of course would top with whipped cream that I would have whipped by hand.
     
    This is neither here nor there. The reason why aspic exists is that it is a preservative. The Romans had something like it, I believe. It is a pain in the ass to make and as the centuries wore on it became more and more of an upper-class thing. The supremely aspirational Victorians couldn’t get enough. The grander the house, the more food you ate in aspic. You might have eggs in aspic for breakfast because one of the kitchen maids would have made it for you. Aspic also does a job of hiding meat that is slightly off, so if you were to serve pork, let’s say, you could serve it in aspic. Victorians also liked the sheen it gave to the food, and food in aspic can be shaped in pleasing ways. For example, suppose you wanted to serve fish to guests. The cook or maybe one of the kitchen maids would cook the fish, debone it, and then put it back together in aspic. 
     
    And then came gelatin, a late-Victorian invention. Suddenly, aspic became available to the middle classes. It really took off in the 1920s which, for all its glamour and flapper-ish reputation, those women learned to cook from their mothers, who were born in the late-Victorian era. Simultaneous to this came Jell-O, the product of someone who came up with the idea that gelatin could be flavored and served on its own.
     
    Time marches on, and the women who were serving Jell-O as dessert to their children in the 1920s and through the Depression taught their lessons well, and those women became wives and mothers themselves. Jell-O did not let the grass grow under their feet, so the immediate post-war era, from, say, 1945 to 1960, saw both a return to foods in aspic (like the Victorians) but with a modern twist, in flavored gelatin. You could do anything with it. Suspend (canned) fruit in it, that was popular. Then came the idea that you could present entire meals in Jell-O, like hot dogs and peas (I’ve seen this recipe).
     
    With every revolution comes a backlash, and people by and large turned away from suspending things in Jell-O, but there are tons of things that are commonly eaten that people in the 1950s would have found weird. All the flavored snacks, for example. The Better Half and I were in a grocery store in the snack food aisle and there was something that I found particularly implausible and he wisely said, “Well, there are only two bags left, so some people seem to like them.” The whole concept of slicing a sugary donut and using it to form a basis for savory sandwiches brings up a gag reflex for me, but I don’t know why, I’ve had, and have made, savory crepes. Now apparently you can have anything made into ice cream, and the more bizarre the combo the more people seem to clamor for it. 
     
    What do I know. I’m still reeling from the avocado toast craze that swept the nation starting only a few years ago. Yes, you could do it, but (in pre-pandemic times) could you really get away with charging $11 for it? The Better Half sometimes makes it for himself, but if I’m on the scene and in the mood I’ll slap the knife out of his hand and say, “No, I’ll make a simple guacamole and roll it up in a toasted soft tortilla and you can have that.” 
     
    The pandemic is doing strange things to all of us. 

      • No drugs, sadly. 
         
        When The Better Half retrieved me and he summoned an Uber (which came and parked across a busy intersection, rather than the pick-up point for people exiting the hospital, ESPECIALLY PEOPLE WHO HAD JUST HAD LEG SURGERY) I asked him, “So, what did you eat while I was away?” I won’t go into detail. But I am being waited on hand and foot. Months into this lockdown we are now supporting local businesses via takeout. We’re not using one of those awful predatory apps; BH schleps and gets the food himself and somehow conveys 20+% to whomever hands over the food.
         
        “I’m a little unsteady on my feet but I can still stand at a stove. I was thinking, in the spirit of me being sick and all, we could use up that chicken noodle soup and I could make…”
         
        “Too late. I’m picking up tacos. I’ll be back in a few minutes. Remember, if you’re going to have a fatal fall try not to land on the dog and take him with you.”

    • Hey there, Matt, good to see you again!  I hope the recovery goes well, although I’m sure you’re dealing with a fair amount of post-op pain right now.  Not sure what kind of surgery you had, but if it was joint related, hopefully they supplied you with a cold water compression therapy machine.  That thing was my own personal miracle when I had my shoulder surgery.

      • It’s good to be back! It isn’t a joint thing, it is somehow worse. It requires a device only made or shipped from Texas, and the company has stopped all shipments for the time being. This now has a domino effect, because I, personally, am supposed to get this device, yet a member of the Visiting Nurse Service of New York has to work it for me. 
         
        It’s a great country, isn’t it? Best health care system in the world. The next time someone tells me that National Health is a doomed, unworkable plan that sends apocryphal Canadians fleeing across the border to seek treatment in the US I’m going to kick them in the ass with my remaining, working leg. 

  5. Is this a Midwestern thing? I had a lot of poppy seed desserts and pastries growing up in Pittsburgh, lots of eastern Europeans, but never in a custard. I’m fond of custard pies but they are a lot of work. 

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