Happy Festivus! [NOT 23/12/24]

Hi, friends!

May you be enjoying a lovely Festivus for the rest of us!

What are some alternatives to the standard Festivus activities that you would do?

I like the idea of feats of strength, but (1) I don’t want to wrestle and (2) I live alone, so wrestling the head of the household will look like I’m having a medical emergency on the floor.

Alternative feats of strength? Most impressive cheese consumption? Best tupperware balancing act? Least amount of effort to fold a basket of laundry?

Whatcha got?

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9 Comments

  1. whats a standard festivus?

    this whole airing of grievances shit?

    nobody told me about that

    could be im a backwards little soul

    but if i have grievances…you will know about it…christmas or no

  2. Way before Festivus we used to leg wrestle my dad at family holidays.  Nobody ever beat him, even when he was getting old & my brother, his friends & I thought we could finally beat him.  I do Festivus in July when we get together w/ my wife’s brother & air our grievances against her dead sister’s entitled family.

  3. FYI friends and I have determined that –

    1. Half the US population is too stupid to understand the Biden commuting the death penalty for 37 federal prisoners is not the same as releasing from them jail. The amount of social media arguments folks have been in today about trying to explain they have life sentences instead and being told we’re liars is just painful.

    2. Half the US population is really jacking off to the idea of executing federal prisoners and really pissypants about having their jollies ruined by the commutations.

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