Happy Hour [7/4/23]

I need a drink

It seems like everybody is playing with Chat GPT. As someone whose child had not one but two Furbies, I found this amusing, frighteningly believable, and totally unnecessary. They were already creepy toys.

And a bar in Houston tested out ChatGPT created cocktails but found them overly sweet and lacking balance. At least our bartender jobs are safe…for now. Dun dun dun!

What’s up with you, Deadsplinters?


  1. i think im okay with a furby takeover

    in my mind that works out as some kind of mix between gremlins and five nights at freddys

    i think…i would quite like to see what looks like

    probably one of those careful what you wish for things

    buuuuttt….. im fairly confident in my ability to drop kick a furby a fair distance if i need to

    so i say bring it…..

    course…..a horde of them…might be a problem…lol

  2. …someone I know has developed a habit of trying to get chatGPT to produce suggestions for sandwiches for several generations of the thing at thins point…which I guess has sort of worked in that the suggestions from the latest version are better than previous incarnations could muster…but I can’t say as even those sound appetizing to me?

    …they haven’t said as much but I have a suspicion it’s connected to a theory they used to espouse as a teenager…generally while somewhat intoxicated…about how you can accurately gauge the sophistication of a civilization by its relationship to toast…which in fairness was actually a much better reasoned model of assessment than I’m making it sound…but we were all a lot more young & innocent in those days…&…well…frequently intoxicated

    …so…better AI-furbies than tribbles, I guess…even if it seems like we could wind being toast, either way?

  3. accurately gauge the sophistication of a civilization by its relationship to toast

    This is an interesting idea. I personally love toast. A really good bread doesn’t even need butter.

    • i had toast for breakfast today….. buttered…with ham and cheese on it… open sammich style

      course i overslept bad enough that i actually had to eat them as i was walking to work today

      ….it uhhh…is a little wierd running around outside with toast….. but it did make me realize one thing…

      i need one of them beer helmets…. you know the ones… two cans and straws

      need to modify that shit for coffee and leave it by the toaster

      it’ll be just perfect for my bi weekly at best oh fuck oh fuck i overslept again breakfast on the go days

      it may not be sophisticated….but its efficient

      • …I feel like this could be done…a while back somewhere…I think it might have been the dreaded starbucks…had a re-usable “to-go” cup/mug that was red on account of a charity link…about the same dimensions as a 500ml beer can…with a slight dip in the middle (vertically-speaking) that would stop it slipping if secured by looping something around that “waist” which could be cinched in a suitable fashion

        …personally I’d probably only need the one to actually have coffee in it…but in the interests of not throwing off the wearer’s balance maybe a pair would be better…could fill the second one with OJ or water or something & alternate sips to keep the ballast even?

        • oh i definitely need the two……i dont do mornings

          im a night shift man stuck on earlies…..its not a great pairing

          fuck make both double espressos

        • eh hot beverages dont stay hot very long outside at 6:15 am most of the year over here

          i also dont do iced coffee… the warmness is part of what makes it so important to me

            • i mean… thats what the lid and straws are for

              your sposed to just hold it out the window as you let nature cool it down to a drinkable temperature

              and then drink it from the straw once its cool enough to not melt your taste buds but still warm

              its like….a martial art…. the way of the coffee drinker

    • …it was quite an elaborate theory if memory serves…your caveman doesn’t even know what fire is…let alone flour…but once you figure those out you maybe aren’t sitting on the dirt any more…possibly aren’t even technically a cave-dweller…but your bread is kind of crappy…the flour’s uneven…you could break a tooth on something that shouldn’t have got baked in there to begin with…that sort of thing…but eventually…once you’re maybe sitting on an actual chair…possibly at a bona fide table…applying fire the one time isn’t enough…no…for a sophisticated palate like that…we burn it again just to show off

      …& then you have industrial revolutions & such…& the chorleywood process…& even machines whose sole purpose is to take previously cooked bread & cook it again to provide toast you don’t have to wave at a fire on a telescopic fork before flipping around to singe the other side…that burns both sides at once

      …& maybe…in some far flung future that probably involves dyson spheres & all sorts of fantastic goodies…they’ll finally invent a toaster that can be relied upon to stop at the point of toast without needing to pop the slices manually before it goes ahead & burns those suckers?

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