Maneuvering on the X, Y and Z axes
I thought about launching into a driving rant, but decided I’d go in a different direction to talk about people’s ability to move (or not) in space.
What got me started was trying to get through a parking lot and encountering the dreaded back in parkers. It’s not inherently bad practice – if nobody else is around, then it’s fine. And if someone is really good at, it doesn’t take more time than pulling in.
But in a crowded lot with everyone being held up by a person who is bad at backing up, it’s huge pain for everyone, and increases the odds of parking lot gridlock.
What Are Your Maneuvering Stories?
Do you have situations where people muck things up about getting around? Or where they’ve gotten better? Maybe once a year I’ll stop in to a local Marshalls, and they’ve gone to a single snaking aisle which feeds multiple registers, instead of forcing everyone to play roulette, pick a register, and hope it’s a fast line.
On the other hand, one of my local liquor stores has a single line for multiple registers, but for reasons I can never understand a bunch of times the first person waiting for a free register will wait about 15 feet away. You can move closer and make it easier for people to line up behind you!
So what about you and moving through space? Any particularly dreaded escalators? Do you ride a set of elevators where everyone magically makes the appropriate amount of space for every new person?
Or what about animals? Do you have a cat who can leap perfectly onto a shelf between two fragile vases, or a dog who can run full speed through the woods without hitting a tree?
Do you go to walking or biking paths in a local park? Are people considerate and call out if they want to pass you, and everyone stays on the right and passes on the left? Or is it a rugby-style free for all scrum? Have you dealt with airport security recently? Was TSA keeping everyone moving and in a good mood, or was it turning into a big swamp? Did you have to deal with people pulling three bags on wheels that were clearly too big for carryons, blocking the gate and desperately hoping they didn’t have to check them?
Or maybe you have a memory of an athlete like Barry Sanders or Allen Iverson who seemed to be able to move through space like nobody else on the planet. Or take a look at Johan Cruyff weaving and dodging through a crowded soccer pitch, seeing how spaces open and close better than anyone else.
Share with us, Deadsplintermovers, any experiences you’ve had good, bad or ugly where you’ve tried to move through the world, or watched people succeed or fail. Are there places you like because you can slip through like a watermelon seed being squeezed between two fingers, or places you dread because everything moves slower than a snail engulfed in molasses? Tell us what you got.
I used to be horrible at backing into parking spaces. But once I got a car with a back-up camera? Holy shit is it easy now!
It definitely makes it easier. It also makes it easier to back out of a space, so I tend to be less worried about hitting anyone. I still check my mirrors though.
One of the craziest things I dealt with was someone didn’t set their parking brake on their truck and it rolled down their driveway just as I was about to pass that house.
I had 3 choices
1 Accelerate as fast as I can so I just miss the truck.
2 Swerve, go into the ditch at 55kph and get hurt/wreck my car.
3 Brake and smash into the truck and get hurt or killed.
I did 1 and made it.
The reason why I could make that decision is something called situational awareness. Usually uttered by Archer Fans or fight jocks. The idea is based on the OODA loop (Observe, Orientate, Decide and Act.) The idea is to have a tight OODA loop where you act on split second timing based on quick observations, fast reactions and decision making.
I’m guessing you weren’t searching for just the right emoji to text at the time…..
“hang on I need to make a tiktok”
Yeah. Nearly got sideswiped by an idiot watching porn while driving. He had it on the main viewer.
Nope. I had someone once complain I never looked at them when they talked… While I was driving.
Idiot.
I am 99.8% focused on the road.
Also I got busted for looking at my phone while at a red light by a cop… A $1500 mistake never to be repeated.
I never respond to my phone while I’m driving. I’ll pull over if I think something really dire might be coming in.
But $1500? Whoa, that’s a serious disincentive. We could use that here.
Actually cost me $1600 so far.
$500 for the traffic court lawyer
$650 for the fine
$450+ for my insurance going up.
I don’t know how much it will go up next year.
I was at a stop light and did a quick peak… Because I was waiting for an important message… While right next to a cop. I was so stupid.