New Day, New Excuses [NOT 24/8/21]

Michael Bluth from Arrested Development with quote "I don't know what I expected"
I really don't know what I expected

Hi, friends! Lately at work I’ve been dealing with people who always have new excuses for the same bullshit behavior. And it’s gotten old. A coworker and I have a game now where we try to guess the excuse and we’ve been pretty accurate lately!

Now that the Pfizer shot has full FDA approval in the US, what do we think the new excuses are going to be? I saw a stat that something like 3 in 10 people polled who weren’t vaccinated said they weren’t willing to do it because it wasn’t fully approved, but we all know 30% of unvaccinated folks aren’t planning on getting vaccinated now.

Also, this dude cracks me up in his fake conservative videos. Please enjoy!

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20 Comments

  1. Nice hat tip to Back to the Future there.

    I think there was a string yesterday where some folks rightly pointed out that it will never matter what the excuses are for these imbeciles because they will always find a new one once the one they had previously claimed gets thrown out the window.  I just hope they all die off quickly enough to prevent the development of new variants in the US.

     

  2. It is a new day, and that means I will return to the Sinatra Celebrity Cookbook. I have mentioned before that Better Half is not a fan of this eccentric culinary experiment of mine so this will take some subterfuge.

    It is sultry in the World’s Greatest City™ so I thought I’d make Pasta Primavera. I make this quite often so BH will be none the wiser. The SCC has no fewer than three recipes. One is from Sirio Maccioni himself, and that’s what I usually make, and I even contributed my Maccioni-inspired recipe here , although for the SCC he tells you to use spaghetti, which I wouldn’t do.

    Another one is from Bruce Jenner, as Jenner was then known, but aside from being problematic the accompanying headshot includes the then-wife Kris, so no no no.

    The third is from Dame Joan Collins. So what I did was (her headshot is fabulous by the way) is handwrite her ingredient list and sneak out to the nearby vegetable stand and gather the ingredients. Now I have memorized the recipe (this isn’t hard, boil the pasta, chop the vegetables) so the SCC will be nowhere in sight. The sight of the SCC is, at this point, to Better Half what the sight of a crucifix is to Dracula.

    This will be my fourth meal out of the SCC but once again I won’t be getting an FYCE post out of it. On the opposite page is Tim Allen’s Tim’s Favorite Manly Man Mixed Vegetable Lasagna but since Tim is a Trumper and has a shady past I think I’ll skip that and move right along to Carol Alt’s Vegetable Lasagna, once the weather cools down a bit.

    Conrad Bain contributed Cherry Tomato Surprise but I’m not sure what’s so surprising about it, it’s cherry tomatoes and celery with scallions and parsley, and a recipe for a vinaigrette. Still, this heat is supposed to continue and I’ve never made a salad with cherry tomatoes and celery so maybe that will be dinner for tomorrow night. Or, if I’m feeling ambitious, I may pair it with Cher’s Tuna Pasta, which is meant to be served cold.

  3. We had a dude who would lay out using whatever excuse he can muster. The first time dumbass said self-contradicting shit or went with something verifiable he’s fired. Naturally we were treated to a barrage of self-serving not-my-faults rants on voicemails.

  4. @brightersideoflife Are they at least coming up with inventive excuses that offer some entertainment value? The anti vaxxers are either going to deny that the vaccine has been fully approved, FAKE NEWS, or claim that the Biden administration rammed it through. 

  5. Hopefully no antivaxxers read this post and get inspired… If I were to be of the antivaxxing inclination or leader of their cult, I would misconstrue the vaccines’ lesser talked about effects on women’s menstruation and claim it causes infertility.

  6. excuses remain unchanged at my work …ive got the one guy that remains worried about long term side effects. i can almost understand him…his concerns seem reasonable
    and a few that think the vaccine will scramble your dna and also give the gubment the ability to remote control you and make you murder yourself
    those are a little harder to understand
    but meh….you get used to a lot of crazy on the shop floor

    • oh god that videonow the vatican..theres a place you can trust with your body…plus if the vaccine turns out to be bad they’ll just move it to a different parish *dies*

      • anyways…i dont give a fuck about the unvaxxed reasons anymore
        as i pointed out to my least favourite anti vaxxer at work…im vaccinated…my mums vaccinated….i dont really give a fuck if you get sick and die…coz whatever i catch off you…probably wont kill my mom now

  7. I just realized I didn’t give you all my covid exposure update – we’ve had second tests come back negative, and seem to be in the clear at this point.
     
    We got tested Thursday and didn’t get results back until yesterday, so that was a fun wait. Every other time I’ve gotten a PCR test I’ve gotten results next day, but this one was at a Walgreens and they were an absolute mess, so I wasn’t all that shocked that the results also took forever. We were in the drive through for almost an hour – about 20 minutes of which was at the window, with the girl struggling to put together our test kits. I don’t even understand what she was doing. She kept folding papers and then moving stuff from one bag to another, and disappearing, and reappearing with another paper to slowly and carefully fold… It was truly maddening. 

    • @farscythe well then. I so very much want to solve this for you; at least I can send you internet hugs and support. It is clear that your friends at Oppo have your back – I do too, if you want to talk to a mom-age person. The beach camping you mentioned sounds relaxing and meditative and a good way to clear your mind. I am wishing you rest and rejuvenation and balance. And…if I may be so bold as to say…it is perhaps time to put yourself first and sort out the home arrangement? As are you now, many years ago I was in a space where a relationship was over, but the living arrangements were not. It wasn’t an easy path to walk or leave. Hugs, hugs, hugs.

      • Thank you 😊
        Think I just need to take these 3 weeks to figure some shit out for myself and then see where we are
        In any event getting myself canned for this shit would be counterproductive…so I’ll be aiming for not that

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