Oh No You Didn’t! [DOT 7/8/21]

The US women’s soccer team won the bronze medal at the Tokyo 2021 Olympics. I don’t know about you guys but I think that with all the pressure put on them, especially after winning (checks notes) THE FUCKING WORLD CUP in 2019, that is an honourable feat worthy of celebration by EVERY American who religiously follows sports. At the very least, it’s worthy of a congratulatory statement from the president or any former president, one would think.

It turns out that a twice-impeached, two-time popular vote loser former president doesn’t think so:

Some of those daughters of bitches gone and done what those NFL sons of bitches started and stormed the state capitol to kidnap and hang the governor …all apologies… stormed the capitol building and beat cops half to death in attempt to overturn a federal election quietly knelt…and that’s why they LOST!

Pictured The team that won Gold:

Alternate headline: Woke as Fuck Canada Wins Gold Medal in Women’s Soccer!


Tucker Carlson is in Hungary because why not take a random and meaningless vacation from his studio at FOX?

Of course, to some bitter snowflakes, it appears intentional for some sort of reason but there is nothing to see here…unless you’re interested in watching those who directed the Titanic toward the iceberg be the first to scream “ICEBERG!” and wiggle their way to be among the first in the lifeboats.

Not to take away from what is really important:

Bipartisanship and electric cars! I’m confident we’ll all be Hungary for those come 2030.


Meanwhile in Woke As Fuck Canada…

Andrea Horwath, leader of the NDP (the “leftist”-est? leaning party) in Ontario was adamant that it was wrong to enforce mandatory vaccinations for health and education workers because she considers it a charter right for people to refuse the vaccine:

I don’t take lightly people’s charter rights, and so that’s why what we’re saying is rapid tests, or your vaccination status and being vaccinated

“Oh No You Didn’t!” said EVERYONE in Canada except #wexiters in Alberta.

Allow me to pause for a moment to share with you The Onion of Canada‘s post in this regard:

TORONTO – Ontario NDP leader Andrea Horwath announced that she would oppose mandatory COVID vaccinations for teachers, yet another plank in her expansive new plan to never become Ontario’s premier in a million years.

With a provincial election set for 2022, Horwath has recommitted herself to completely tanking her party’s chances of ever forming a government. “Since becoming my party’s leader in 2009 Ontarians have come to count on me for one thing,” Horwath explained, “absolutely fucking imploding when it comes to election time.”

“If there is one thing I have made clear over my 11 years as leader – that’s right, 11 whole years, and counting – it’s that I have absolutely zero interest in ever leading the Ontario NDP to win an election,” Horwath reminded her assembled MPPs and staffers. “We have among us many excellent elected representatives as well as hardworking staff and volunteers, and I want to take this opportunity to remind you all that I remain steadfast in not giving a royal rat fuck about any of them.”

“This year I face a historically unpopular Doug Ford, as well as a significantly reduced Liberal Party, making this an exceptionally difficult election to lose,” Horwath warned.

“But I promise you, starting with this baffling opposition to largely popular vaccine mandates, I will once again snatch defeat from the jaws of victory!” Horwath then raised her arms triumphantly, as her weary NDP party members stared on.

Horwath cited her exemplary record of never coming even close to being elected premier, which included tactics like: becoming a complete non-entity, even when she was the official opposition leader; allowing the provincial Liberals to completely outflank her to the left in 2014; and a general lack of charisma that some political observers have dubbed “Paul Martin-esque”.

Horwath was then asked what she has in store to “seal the deal” in the coming 2022 election beyond just her shockingly hard stance against vaccine mandates. The party leader then promised several new tricks to add to the NDP’s traditional game plan of uninspired campaigning and confused internal messaging.

“We just want to remind everyone that even though the NDP are the natural home for Ontario’s left-leaning voters, we don’t have to be,” Horwath explained, before leaving to put up some Ontario Liberal Party lawn signs.

At press time, Ontario Liberal leader Steven Del Duca is, like most other Ontarians, actively working to learn his own name for the first time.

The Beaverton

Not to worry, everyone. She read that Beaverton post and is now singing a completely different tune called I was dumb enough to think I could steal a few votes from the Conservative party but now realise all I have done is own the libs whose votes I was supposed to steal away

…and what a tune it is:

Hello Ontario.

I’ve always been a strong advocate for doing everything we can to ensure every Ontarian is vaccinated. This is especially critical in health care and education.

I fully support mandatory vaccination in health care and education, based on science and public health priorities. I should have made that position clearer, much earlier, in support of the health and safety of the most vulnerable among us: seniors, people with disabilities, people who are sick, and children who can’t yet get their vaccines.

I also believe we need to reach out to people, find out what their barrier is, and address it. Whether that’s paid time off for a gig worker, or taking the vaccine directly to the home of a single parent with two jobs and two kids. Doug Ford has failed to do that work.

On Wednesday I made a mistake suggesting a mandatory vaccine policy during a global pandemic should take a back seat to charter rights. I regret the comment. I was wrong. My fight and my focus must be on keeping people healthy and safe. This unprecedented time requires unprecedented actions.

It’s time to make sure every education and health care worker gets the protection of a vaccine. Now, let’s work together to convince Doug Ford.

Andrea Horwath – Ontario NDP Leader & singer of tunes

Wow!

“I should have made my position clearer when I debated, unrelentingly, the exact opposite position with my colleagues yesterday” is the epitome of walk-backs if you ask me.


Allow me to direct your attention back to “the greatest experiment” (that is about to fail):


Speaking of experiments destined to fail:


John McCain’s daughter will never have to walk-back any statements she has made because, well, she is John McCain’s daughter. Is it just me who finds it slightly odd that when we talk about nepotism, it’s always about people who don’t season their chicken and don’t wash their legs and put raisins in potato salad?

According to John McCain’s daughter some nepotism is “worse” than other nepotism. I suppose that could be considered a thing to those who go about their lives (dog-)Whistlin’ Dixie…

but…

dude

dude

…take a fucking hint from the president who represents your own party and walk-back NOW because sooner or later the time will come in which you have no choice.

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About myopicprophet 129 Articles
Kinja refugee. Rants often. Right sometimes.

17 Comments

  1. Meghan McCain had better make hay while the sun shines, because in America we have the memory of a fruit fly and soon enough few will remember who John McCain was. As it is I doubt a majority remember that John McCain’s daughter’s father ran for President and how many non-View viewers could tell you whether he was dead or alive? Maybe Trumpers could because Trump, the sitting President, was purposely excluded from the funeral, while all the ex-Presidents got preferred seating.

     

  2. Well, Myo, you pushed me down the Texas Education Agency rabbit hole, or maybe rat hole in this case. I’m still trying to understand their cavalier and dangerous policy. Do they the lack the infrastructure to notify and trace? Is there a virtual school option? (Umm, nope, unless the individual districts contract privately for the service.) I just do not understand. 

    • Typical dirty librul.  It’s not that complicated.  They’re just owning the libs and displaying fealty to their Lord and Savior, Donald J. (the J stands for Jesus) Trump.

    • If the TEA lacks infrastructure or funding to do any of those things, it’s by design. Few places out-Texas Texas in terms of chronically underfunding government in the service of arguing for small government. It’s as much Libertarian and small-govt Conservative as it is “owning the Libs”. 

  3. Did Biden make vroom vroom noises like the twice impeached, one term president did while posing in a truck?

    • He looks way too cool with those aviators to make vroom vroom noises.  He was probably singing Roadhouse Blues to himself.

  4. It is a beautiful summer morning here in The Greatest City in the World™. Supposed to be “a hot one,” so maybe it’s a beach day. We could go to Seaside Heights, where much of Jersey Shore was filmed:

    https://www.nj.com/ocean/2021/08/jersey-shore-town-seeks-shut-down-of-3-motels-6-rental-properties-due-to-hundreds-of-police-calls.html

  5.  
    Bipartisanship and electric cars! I’m confident we’ll all be Hungary for those come 2030.
    hate to break it to yous….but we will never have the infrastructure to make lectric cars feasable for all
    and will probably be on fire or underwater by 2030
    you know the sayings?
    too little too late?
    soo sad too bad?
    yeah,,,thats us

    • also…having paid attention to my murica classes these last few years
      texas doesnt make mistakes
      texas edits the history books
      and if it is written….it must be truth

      • an on the note of morans

  6. Hooray Canada.  I saw the highlights.  It was a pretty tense game.
    Canadian women are a force to be reckoned with in the sports world.  Not so much the guys (the only mens medals won by a pretty damn good sprinter.)
    As for Horvath, she has taken the mantle of ineptitude of Ontario Provincial Parties.  Anyone talented or competent seems to join the Feds.
    1990 David Peterson calls an early election for some fucking stupid reason, fucks it up royally.  Leading to NDP majority.  Manchu votes NDP.
    1995 NDP pisses of their union base by trying to fire civil servants.  “Common Sense” is elected, but non in evidence.  Stoneheaded idiot voted in as premier.  Trying to sell Ontario Hydro leading to Manchu to laugh at his Ontario Hydro pensioner father (who voted PC for the first time in his life-he hates teachers and taxes.)
    1999 Common sense elected again because media loves the stoneheaded moron from North Bay.  Frank Stronach later picks him to be on board of auto parts giant Magna and fucks up capitalism (later booted off the board.)
    2003 A stinky sock puppet is elected after Tories fuck up every crisis/chance to show they’re actual tough guy leaders they preen on TV instead of inept wimps they really are.  Can’t make budget balanced.  Can’t deal with SARS.  Can’t deal with massive electric blackout.  Can’t really do shit.
    2008 Future Mayor of Toronto Tory Tory dies on hill of “let’s give tax funding to rich fucks private schools and religious nuts schools.”  Turns 10% polling lead into 10% polling loss as Atheists, Racists against Islam unite with unwashed proletariat to elect stinky sock puppet again.
    2013 Stinky Sock puppet gives way to Ontario Hillary Clinton if Hils were a lesbian.  Ineptly muddles through pissing off her party’s base and other voters during her time in office.   Including Manchu.
    2018  Manchu votes for NDP for 2nd time in his life as Douglie Ford bullies his way into office thanks to original Tory leader Rapey Brown’s sudden resignation.  Promptly makes Ontario Hils look amazing with his conflicts of interest and stupidity of his base/cabinet.  For a brief shining moment he is a hero of CoVID.  Then as in Ford tradition… takes all that good will and shits on it.  Now a blubbering chickenshit mess and CoVID fuckwad.
    Fuck the woo woo lefty crowd is as bad as the “Fuck coVID” righty crowd.  Anti-vaxx was originally a lefty fringe which became a plank in the right wing base of Xtian freaks thanks to their anti-bortion stand (baby parts in vaccine!)
     
     
     
     

  7. Tucker goes to Hungary… the home of the only nearly fascist gubbiment in Europe.

    • if you are lucky….they will keep him

    • Isn’t he a Swanson heir? I would have never taken him for a Hungary Man. Unless there’s a frozen dinner merger on the horizon…

  8. One reason why the GOP is still confident that they can let Covid write its protocols for public schools is because the NY Times is convinced that widespread death is a horse race! They might just win this one, baby!
     


     
    The absolutely idiotic part of this reporting is that it never asks actual  experts whether this makes any sense. “If Florida comes through” this — what does that mean? Is it even possible?
     
    Maybe the NY Times should drop the political framework for a second and think through the scenario of years of the virus ravaging a seriously underimmune population before simply handwaving their way through the epidemic?
     
    It’s like premising an article on Ron DeSantis becoming a coke abusing maniac, and saying if he doesn’t die of an overdose, he wins politically.
     
    The only way you can do that is to accept a framing that nothing about abusing coke has any other effects except whether or not you die. “I’m not dead, so it’s fine that I’m sleeping 1 hour a night and shooting out the window at imaginary enemies.”
     
    If Florida becomes a long running hotbed of Covid, how exactly does the hospital system survive? How exactly does Florida’s economy manage when corporations move to states where employees aren’t dying? What does this do to Florida’s budget?
     
    Don’t expect political reporters at the Times to ask these questions.

    • This is why scientific and public health knowledge is important for reporters assigned to those beats. It isn’t politics. Hell, it isn’t even economics, where overly confident white men can just guess and bluff their way through it, be wrong, and still retain the “credibility” to rinse, lather, repeat. It’s a fucking pandemic and we need someone with enough subject matter knowledge covering it to have not fallen for the promise of Theranos.

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