Reasons to get white supremacist tattoos if you’re in the NFL draft, ranked

1.) Getting hit by a bus.

2.) You want to get drafted by an NFL team.

3.) You are white and know that there will basically be zero consequences for you actions.

4.) Because you are white, you can pretend that you had no idea the white supremacist tattoo you got was actually a white supremacist tattoo.

5.) NFL owners thought smoking weed was worse than being a white supremacist until like five minutes ago.

6.) NFL GMs think having a mother who is a sex worker is worse than being a white supremacist.

7.) NFL scouts think liking to cook is worse than being a white supremacist.

8.) NFL teams think liking to play video games is worse than being a white supremacist.

9.) You know that most of the NFL’s owners and coaches support the Presidency of a man who can’t bring himself to condemn white supremacists but will call Colin Kaepernick’s mom a bitch.

10.) You realize that the worse thing that will happen is a couple of weeks of negative attention before Dwayne Haskins says something on Twitter and everyone questions the maturity of a black man, while never questioning the decision making of a man who will get a tattoo that he “doesn’t know” has white supremacist connotations, even while having other white supremacy tinged tattoos like “liberty of death” and “don’t tread on me”, because whiteness and adjacency to it is the most powerful force in the universe, and all you have to do is promise to have it removed and everyone will forgive and forget.

11.) You realize America is racist as hell, and if you just flaunt your racism instead of hiding it, you can be a kicker who is actually drafted.

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About KC Complains A Lot 135 Articles
KC Complains A Lot is another refugee from Deadspin. He enjoys writing and not caving to pressure from herbs.

6 Comments

  1. The Dez Bryant one is a strange case where the context changes everything. The offensive question was a follow up to the following: “what does your dad do?” “Pimp” “and your mom” “works for my dad”.

    On the other hand, remember when Laremy Tunsil dropped from a #1 overall pick because of an instagram pic? I wonder what happened to him? Oh, looks like he became the highest paid offensive lineman in the NFL.

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