…now, to be fair, I wasn’t born into vast wealth that I’ve spent a half century pissing away in a literally vain attempt to convince myself & the world that I’m a super smart stable genius who should be in charge of getting everything my own way & allowed to literally or figuratively expunge from reality the bits that I don’t like the look of…so maybe I’m leaping to conclusions about things that would be clear to me were I more personally familiar with that kind of context
…that said, when I look at this
…gotta be honest, my first thought is “why not just plead guilty & quit being such a whiny bitch about it?”
…if you were in his shoes (which you wouldn’t be, assuming you’re possessed of a reading age in the double digits) then surely absent an unswerving faith that contrary to the wealth of evidence suggesting otherwise you are in fact a proper gangster and not the human-adjacent equivalent to a moderately talented 5yr old’s drawing of a superannuated spoiled brat…& of course the ever-present crushing weight of overwhelming guilt…you’d pick representation that didn’t scream at the top of its lungs “guilty as fuck white guy over here looking to throw money at the law until it stops applying to him again”…in which case you’d maybe pick…I dunno…any lawyer but these two or Collude-y Rudi seems like an improvement?
…but that’s presumably the stable bit of the patented Dolt45 brand of genius…never apologize may be a mantra but when literally your every act is a tacit admission of compounded guilt it just makes you look like a fucking idiot, surely?
…the kind of fucking idiot that would, say, turn petulant in inappropriate situations…although let’s face it…at his age petulance is never appropriate…& probably hasn’t been since he was shorter than his fucking tie is these days
…or who could be so unstintingly petty as to have Michelle Obama’s measures to improve school nutrition reversed in favor of having kids eat less healthy food…on the lady’s birthday?
…& I guess a few other things have maybe happened but I wouldn’t blame you if you skipped past in the hope of salvaging some actual peace from your weekend?
…but this one is maybe worth remembering about come Monday if nothing else?
…are we entering a world of pain, here?
…because I’m starting to feel a little like Larry
…still – at least tomorrow isn’t Monday, eh?!