Sign of the times? Man files motion to sword-fight ex-wife, attorney

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Enter the custody battle

A Paola, KS, man is requesting a sword fight with his ex-wife and her attorney in order to settle ongoing disputes in their divorce proceedings.

According to The Guardian, David Ostrom, 40, maintains in a Jan. 3 legal filing, that his ex-wife and her attorney have “destroyed (him) legally” and that trial by combat has never specifically been banned in the US. Ostrom also requested 12 weeks time in order to obtain samurai swords for the proposed battle.

The attorney, Matthew Hudson, of course filed a motion dismissing Ostrom’s motion.

Added The Guardian:

The Ostroms have been embroiled in disputes over custody and visitation issues and property tax payments.

His motion filed in Shelby county district court stemmed from his frustrations with his ex-wife’s attorney, Ostrom told The Des Moines Register.

“I think I’ve met Mr Hudson’s [the ex-wife’s attorney] absurdity with my own absurdity,“ Ostrom said, adding that his former wife could choose Hudson to act as her champion.

The judge issued his own filing indicating that he would not be ruling on the previous motions in the near future, “citing irregularities with both sides’ motions and responses.”

Nothing but irregularities, perhaps?

Anyway, I’ll file this as another sign of the end times curated by Cheetolini and his band of glue sniffers. As someone who grew up in Kansas, I can’t say any of this really surprises me.

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14 Comments

  1. My parents got divorced like 8 years ago (I was well into my adulthood and about to get married myself) and of course it was painful, but it was SHOCKING to me to see them turn into these fucking psychos. They weren’t being the people I knew them to be at all – it was not like, the worst versions of themselves. It was the worst versions of someone out of left field. And they acted like fucking children.

    Of course I realize they were both in pain and grieving and panicking, so I give them a little bit of a pass on all of it now, but until then I’d just never understood stories like you just posted now. But I read this and I’m like, yeah. My dad would have done this if he thought of it.

    • My parents split when I was 17, after 24 years of marriage and, hoo boy, did they make a fucking mess. Basically, my mother got tired of my selfish, alcoholic father’s bullshit and finally decided to do something about it. Because his selfishness was off the charts, he felt blindsided even though they’d had more than one argument about his behavior. So, he went totally apeshit and she went off her own deep end. For my part, I drank my way through it, because the fruit didn’t fall far from the tree, until I physically couldn’t drink anymore and switched to drugs, which obviously made things ever so much better. Eventually I was able to get my own shit together and discovered that after they’d been divorced for a few years they were still doing crazy shit with each other. So, I told them both that I wasn’t going to be dealing with either one of them until they grew up. It took them a couple of years, but eventually they learned how to leave each other alone.

      Not knowing anything about the KS couple, I can sort of sympathize with Mr. Ostram. My first marriage was an unmitigated disaster and my ex’s family had plenty of money with which to bury me, legally speaking. Fun fact: roughly 15% of domestic violence incidents in this country involve the woman assaulting the man. But, she had lawyers and I had pocket lint so I took the brunt of it, again. It took about 10 years before I got to a point where I finally was able to feel little more than indifference towards her, but in the meantime I learned that, in America, you get only as much justice as you can afford.

      • Ugh that sounds like a mess and I’m sorry you went through all that.

        • Yeah, was decidedly not fun. I certainly bear my own responsibility in that particular train wreck–not least because I chose to remain in the relationship all that time she was physically abusing me–but that was a long time ago and I barely recognize the person I was then, thank God.

          • Yes, glad things are better for you. As a person who has been in an abusive relationship, I understand how you get stuck there. Mine was in college and I didn’t have the financial or legal entanglements that marriage brings, but if I had, I don’t know how long I would have stayed.

    • I have to say that I understand the pain and anguish of everyone involved. Feeling like “civilized” processes/contests are not fair and one can not understand or afford them. One looks to the physical contest where pain or death determines who wins regardless of who is right or wrong in the situation. It goes back to the old adage “victors write the history’ and this guy wants the world to know that his ex wife was the reason for the divorce and not him.

  2. I wouldn’t be surprised if my soon to be divorced acquaintance does something like this.

    I would feel kind of sympathetic if he weren’t someone who was on the periphery of the Men’s Rights Issues and used to talk in terms of “Alpha”/”beta” male bullshit. All I’m going to say that this will be a scorched earth financial mess costing millions, a mess of both his and his wife’s doings.

    • Oh man there is nothing like a divorce to push someone straight into MRA territory.

      • Yeah, but he’s like the rest of the MRA crowd. Rather entirely blame the woman than take even a hint of a look inward (where much of the real blame lies.)

        Not on anyone’s side. These are two really awful people who found each other.

        • Watch out – I knew two awful people who found each other and got divorced, and now their awful is all spread out to lots more people hahaha.

    • Sanjuro (1962)

      Seemed like an apt metaphor for the cited proceedings.

      • …ah – saw Mifune & assumed Yojimbo was the source so I’ve learned something today?

  3. People can be such children.

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