Thank You! [DOT 25/11/21]

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Good morning! In the United States, today is Thanksgiving: a day to give thanks for one’s blessings, spend time with family and friends, share a meal, and watch an iconic parade or a little football. The reverse interpretation is that today is a day where the eradication of indigenous peoples is whitewashed, loneliness is exaggerated by the expectations of gatherings, gluttony abounds, and retailer avarice results in stores being open during a traditional holiday. Today’s DOT is dedicated to Thanksgiving, for better or worse.

Thanks | Sports | History | Food | Retail | Music


Today’s Daily Open Thread will rely on you to bring on the news – so thank you.

While forced acts of thanks (let’s all hold hands and go around the table and say what we are thankful for) bring out my snark and cause a reactionary eyeroll, I am truly thankful for the people and animals in my life. I am grateful for my home, my job, and my community. And I am grateful for the DeadSplinter community – you folks are smart, savvy, au courant, and have excellent taste in music.


Thanksgiving and football have become synonymous. This year, the Detroit Lions host their divisional rival Chicago Bears, the Cowboys host the Las Vegas Raiders in an interconference matchup of massive fan bases, and concluding the holiday are the host New Orleans Saints taking on the AFC powerhouse Buffalo Bills. I understand that millions of folks enjoy football; I am one of the killjoys who sees it as brain trauma and early dementia waiting to happen.

History (Myth)

The myth is that friendly Indians, unidentified by tribe, welcome the Pilgrims to America, teach them how to live in this new place, sit down to dinner with them and then disappear. They hand off America to white people so they can create a great nation dedicated to liberty, opportunity and Christianity for the rest of the world to profit. That’s the story—it’s about Native people conceding to colonialism. It’s bloodless and in many ways an extension of the ideology of Manifest Destiny.”


The average American will consume about 4,500 calories on Thanksgiving Day, or about 3,000 for the meal and an additional 1,500 for snacking. To burn off that meal, activity estimates include six hours and 36 minutes of jogging, twelve hours and 45 minutes of walking, or nineteen hours of sex.


Black Friday sales now start on Thanksgiving Day; stores of all types will be open, including Bass Pro Shops, Kmart, and Pep Boys. With over 717 billion dollars in sales up for grabs by retailers, deep discount and artificial “urgency to buy” techniques abound. Violence among shoppers spurred on to get their piece of the pie has resulted in extra security measures, crowd stampedes, and injuries. From the link above, in 2018, 61.53% of shopping violence took place at Walmart. Shopping violence in general included trampling (30%), shooting (26.7%) car-related (16.7%), stabbing (13.3%), fighting (6.7%) and pepper spraying (6.7%).


I want to thank you:

Thank you:

Thank you:

Thank you, DeadSplinterites, for sharing your hearts, brains, hot takes, and considered opinions!

About Elliecoo 474 Articles
Four dogs, one partner. The dogs win.


  1. I am thankful for so many things.

    My list would go on for pages but let me light on this one topic. I am thankful that Emperor Andreus Marcus Maximus has been deposed in a palace coup and for the time being is no longer tyrannizing me and the other citizens of beleaguered Gotham.

    I was doing a little Christmas shopping and found I could get copies of his book, Nice Little State You Have Here, It Would Be A Shame If Something Happened To It, for $1.66 used (no way am I giving him any royalties.) Long ago my friends and family and I stopped exchanging presents, we have too much crap as it is, but we like to shock and awe each other sometimes. One year I received the audiobook (on CD) of Sarah Palin’s Going Rogue, narrated by La Palin herself. That voice. That accent. It would make the most hardened fugitive emerge from their barricaded refuge, hands up.

    I think I have found something even better though:

    What makes this so precious is that I think it was done sincerely, and an obvious grift by the author hoping to make a quick buck (or euro: if you read the self-created marketing description one gets the sense that the creator is Italian) off Cuomo’s mercifully fleeting popularity. Of course this could be a joke and I’m falling for it, the author might be a sly Brooklyn-hipster, but given the date of issue I’m pretty sure the creator had no idea how humorously grotesque this would become.

    Unfathomably to me Cuomo’s brother Fredo Chris is still around, and let me share his unhinged harangue about Thanksgiving:

    So I’m also thankful that I don’t watch CNN or have a Sirius subscription (if that’s how you access Sirius content; I don’t know.)

    I am also thankful that, as I write this, Warren Wilhelm Bill de Blasio will cease to be our Mayor in 36 days, 17 hours, and 16 minutes (but who’s counting.)

    Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.



    • I wonder if that coloring book is by this company, or if there is a whole little industry churning out weird non-ironic coloring books:

      Coloring books they published include:

      President Joe Biden and Vice President Kamala Harris
      President Donald J. Trump and Vice President Michael Pence
      Anti ISIS Coloring Book Comic Culture of Evil
      Pope Francis Coloring and Activity Book
      Ted Cruz to the Future Comic Coloring and Activity Book
      We Did President Barack Obama 2008
      The Tea Party Coloring Book for Kids
      We Shall Never Forget 9/11: The Kids Book of Freedom
      Being Gay Is Okay with Gay Sharing Cards 2013

      • “Independently published,” and only $7.99. The same author, Bibiana Giordano, has another Cuomo coloring book. I did some research before I posted this and little is known of this author. There is one self-admittedly parodic Cuomo coloring book on the market.

  2. I would also like to add that I am grateful that I do not live in Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Congressional district:

    Warning: This is The Hill, so even with an adblocker you’ll be besieged by many pop-up ads. The gist is MTG wants to award a Congressional Gold Medal (whatever that is) to Kyle Rittenhouse for defending Kenosha during a “BLM riot.” What this has to to do with her district at least 1,000 miles away is anyone’s guess.

    • I’d want to be angry, but it is from Gang Greene, the Georgian Trump (she’s a little rich girl of inherited wealth, too.) She’s too stupid to realize that no one sane in her caucus wants that.

  3. Mouthbreathers 1, Justice 1.

    At least the racist dipshit morons in Georgia got what was coming to them.  Still be better if Ahmaud Arbery were alive and none of this had to happen.

    Those idiots believed in their dark racist hearts that wearing white skin was enough immunity from justice.  Good luck with that one you stupid idiots.

    It’s white skin + an actual law enforcement badge that gives racists a license to kill black people with near impunity.  (Or crying on the stand like an actor in a Hallmark movie with a racist asshole judge presiding.)


    • I’m not surprised by a conviction, but I did expect it to be watered down to manslaughter or something. I will point out, though, if that video didn’t exist those murderers would never even have been arrested much less convicted. So yeah, justice but …

        • Thankful isn’t the right word, but I think it’s important there is at least some accountability.  Prosecutors need to think harder how they use their power.

  4. Enjoy the thanksgiving day, US Amercians.

  5. The actual fuck? Apple thinks showing a snowman’s murder is a good idea?


    • If she had just shot the first kid in defense of a third party, maybe the kid on the bicycle would’ve gotten the message.

  6. Au Courant makes me think of the shopping scene in Polyester


    I have a lot to be thankful for, but this morning I’m just tired and grouchy. I made the mistake of texting my sister, to wish her a happy Thanksgiving, and got roped into a Zoom gathering with my siblings and their families. I love most of them but I just want to eat pie, take a hot bath, eat more pie, and lay on my sofa reading and watching TV. Also, eat more pie. Oh well, as the saying goes, this too shall pass.

  7. happy thanksgiving to yous that have it

    i had to work today and apparently christmas radio had to be on

    i figured the only fitting response to that was turning down overtime…coz fuck staying around that noise for a minute longer than i have to

    so today im thankful overtime is optional

    yeah…im not doing it if your gonna torture me for 9 hours first

    (tbh..i think everyone walked maybe they’ll take the hint)

    • also….i would like to know why we have black friday if we dont have thanksgiving here

      its not even the start of christmas shopping here…as thats dec 6th

      its some bullshit…

      (and the offers arent even all that good….i can only assume you americans get better deals…coz the ones we get really arent worth the effort of braining eachother for)

  8. Anybody watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade?

    They opened with the cast of Annie (the live broadcast one happening in a week or whenever on NBC and I fucking cried my eyes out. I don’t even really care for that musical all that much, but people coming out and singing “Together Again” after how fucking horrible the last 2 years have been? Right in the fucking feels, that one hit me hard. And then she followed with “Tomorrow” yeah so there was more crying.

    And then the cast of the Moulin Rouge musical came out and did a number. To quote a facebook friend, nothing says family entertainment! like a musical about hookers. Has anyone here seen that musical yet? I think it came out in 2019. Felt like they were trying too hard to be “sexy.”

    I feel like people think since Cabaret has hookers as main characters that hey it’s cool and we can make it work, too. But like…not everyone is Fosse.

  9. It is hard to be thankful about today’s football games.  Do we really have to have the awful Detroit Lions every fucking year?  Also, fuck the Cowboys!

    If I get my choice on the exercise thing, I’ll take the 19 hours of sex but obviously, I don’t get that choice so will settle for a quickie & some 16oz curls?

    The truth about that first Thanksgiving…

    It’s always a challenge around here having Thanksgiving w/ our pescetarian daughter…

    Post image

    • OMG, that’s a horrific image!

    • Cthulu? Also, team pescatarian.

    • “Do we really have to have the awful Detroit Lions every fucking year?”


      But Shaq, how else will the poor Lions get enough guaranteed TV views to allow the team any of the revenue-sharing dollars from the league?

      Everyone in the NFC North knows that the week you play the Lions is the week you don’t have to watch your team’s game, because it’s basically just a second bye week** most years…



      **at least it always *was* like a second bye week, back when I DID used to watch American football!😆😂🤣💞

  10. They unhooked my stepsis from everything except pain meds last night. The doctors say it could be hours or days. I hope she doesn’t die IN Thanksgiving, though it doesn’t really matter. My grandma died 2 days before xmas 10 yrs ago and it just wrecks the holiday. My dad is still throwing something together even though he expects his wife to be at the hospital most of the day. Just a bunch of ugh.

    • Hugs to you @Pumpkinspies, and again, deepest condolences to you and your family.

    • I’m so sorry your family is going through this on a holiday. We had a 3 year run in my family back in the late 00s where every year we lost someone on Christmas or Christmas Eve, and it really does a number on holidays for years.

      I don’t know if your family is religious, but one of my religion class teachers in high school always said that so many people pass around holidays because Mary is bringing them home to heaven to spend the holidays with their families there. I have friends who find that very comforting.

    • I’m so sorry. It must be so hard for you and your family.

  11. National Dog Show.  There is a “White Bull Terrier” and a “Colored Bull Terrier.”  Really?  That’s the terminology you want to use?

    • Yeah that’s a rough one. You’d think they could be white and variegated. Or something else not horrible.

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