Hi, friends!
Topic of the night is what is the Christmas movie/tv show that you cannot fucking stand. Like my parents love any version of Dicken’s A Christmas Carol, except the best one (Muppets). The drier and more boring, the better. I can tolerate these, even the slooooooow 3 episode one that FX made a few years ago which is 3 hours long without commercials.
But the one I cannot stand? It’s a Wonderful Life. Cannot fucking stand that movie. The townspeople have been fucked over by the bank and what do they do? Give the bank even more of their money. It’s like the 2007 Financial Crisis in old-timey settings. Byyyyeeee all your savings and assets, but hey he is really sorry about losing that money through poor decisions, so let’s give him more of your money so the bank stays open. Because that’s what matters, that the bank gets a bailout and he keeps his job.
Today’s version Old Man Potter is played by Sammy Blip Fuckwit
This is a tough one…um…all of them?
I only like one Christmas movie: Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.
You don’t like Die Hard? The greatest Xmas movie of all time?
Also, Bad Santa is a pretty great movie and probably would have been even better if John Ritter hadn’t died during the filming.
Jurassic World is set over those annoying kids’ Christmas break, so as far as I’m concerned it’s a Christmas movie.
Did even one of them get eaten? If not, how good can it be?
My daughters love the Santa Clause series which I cannot stand. It got even worst when I found out how much of a douche Trumper Tim Allen is. I like some movies I consider Christmas movies as I mentioned above. Another I will add to the “nice” list is Gremlins.
How the fuck am I getting ratioed?
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles is BY FAR the best Xmas movie!
Eyes Wide Shut seems more like a Christmas present than Christmas movie but, wow, I totally thought I never saw that list before until I saw my comment. Good job!
I was ratioed all over that as well.
Wait, we can ratioed in here?
Anyway, you have my support. That’s a great holiday flick. I have a college buddy who still does the little Del Griffith chuckle and then says, “I like me.” Classic.
It’s a Thanksgiving movie.
For merely argument’s sake, the Star Wars Holiday Special.
As a less than discerning 8 year old hungry for anything Star Wars, I loved it. Age has jaded me. It’s horrible.
Actually I hate most special holiday episodes. Except for Community’s ones because they are not maudlin.
I was really looking forward to the Guardians of the Galaxy holiday special because they’re kidnapping Kevin Bacon! That sounds great as a plot for that group.
Then I spent way too much of the special being like wow either James Gunn has a family member in this band or he just really really really loves them so I guess we’re getting more of them.
I was going to save this for my next DUAN but since you don’t participate in that, I will share this here, this is my Christmas present to you…
I don’t think you can fully appreciate the Guardians Holiday Special unless you’ve watched the Star Wars Holiday Special. There’s a lot of points where Guardians is parodying Star Wars.
I’m not saying it’s fabulous, but there’s a bit more going on there.
Oh no. No no no no. The Star Wars Holiday Special had everything, as Stefon would say. Blockbuster movie tie-in with musical numbers with late-70s fetish for guest stars (and “stars”) and BEA ARTHUR.
You played the Bea Arthur card. I approve.
My first grade teachers thought it would be fun to show us Scrooge and it scared me to death. Albert Finney was too good of an actor — his terror when the Ghost of Christmas Future sent Scrooge to Hell left me scarred.
Yup, hands down It’s a Wonderful Life. Although the Nic Cage remake is at least watchable.
There are two good bits in Wonderful Life. One is is how much fun it looked like could be had in alternate universe Potterville. The other is Jimmy Stewart pulling aside the mask just briefly when he thought he was ruined and displaying pure rage. Stewart went somewhere dark when he screamed at his family — I think he was channelling the PTSD he was feeling from times like this. Amazing acting.
https://www.denofgeek.com/movies/jimmy-stewart-ww2-mission-air-force/
As mentioned in the article, he and Navy Vet Henry Fonda would spent many quiet hours building models and rarely spoke politics. The one time they did, Henry got the best of him in a fierce screaming argument and then they never did that again.
I mentioned my antipathy toward It’s a Wonderful Life really recently. Last night, was it? How I’d rather live in Pottersville than Bedford Falls? Did I imagine this, or maybe like George Bailey an angel showed me what it would have been like had I left that comment?
I watch this gem every year (I just watched it again a couple of nights ago!)
Bob Newhart is top 10 greatest tv star/comedian of all time!
Am I seeing double and there are two Bob Newharts?
Pretty sure one of the Newharts is Dom DeLuise.
It is Dom DeLuise! He took his comedy act to the “Dean Martin Show” at some early point and they liked each other. More importantly, Dom was an audience favorite so he became a regular. Most importantly to me, he was also a cookbook author and he is ripe for a Celebrity FYCE post or seven if anything is available online.
It’s a Wonderful Life is an easy target, but I agree that it sucks.
Same with Miracle on 34th Street. Most movies of that era do little for me. Bing Crosby made two Xmas movies that are the same story, so, when people complain that Hollywood doesn’t have any new ideas, that’s the default setting.
Ms. Meme says Love Actually is a Christmas movie, and that one can step off, IMO.
The later Muppet movie where they have to save the theater is disappointing, and that’s before we address the hell-spawn quartet of Whoopi Goldberg, Carson Daly, Kelly Ripa, and Joe Rogan.
I know a ton of people love that movie, and yes the cast does a great job with Love, Actually.
But I feel like the overwhelming message is just women need to shut up in order to be deserving of love. Be passive recipients of male affection, don’t have your own thoughts dearie.
Little kid obsessed with girl? Nope no talking to her, her thoughts don’t matter. Impress with drums.
Keira Knightley’s character? Nope don’t ever tell her you love her, either. Just show up and show the cards and put her into a position of knowing things that she doesn’t need to so he feels better.
What’s her face with the prime minister? Aside from people calling her fat all the time, does he ever really talk to her?
Colin Firth falls in love with a woman who literally doesn’t speak his language.
Laura Linney is desperate for the one dude and as soon as she also needs to have any part of life besides that dude (her brother) ope there goes her chance of love, back to singlehood FOREVER.
And the only female character with a very strong voice is Emma Thompson, and she’s literally being cheated on by her husband.
What’s often forgotten about Miracle on 34th Street is that hard-charging retail executive Maureen O’Hara is a single mother to doomed child star Natalie Wood (Robert Wagner and their host Christopher Walken—I won’t delve into conspiracy theories but you know they were totally—)
Anyway, if you remember the tacked-on audience-pleasing ending to the film, Mo and Nat and the new husband get their Christmas wish granted: A house in a new postwar suburb! It’s 1947 when the film came out. Can you imagine being a successful woman executive at Macy’s, then at the top of its game, and living in a fab Manhattan apartment, and the new husband also had one with a spare guest room, and moving to some Levittown? Not really, but it’s close enough. I just can’t. Even if it was coded as Fairfield County, Connecticut. Which, by the way, the movie lost the Oscar to Gentleman’s Agreement, which also takes place in Fairfield County.
And did you know that Maureen O’Hara, an Irish native, is buried at Arlington National Cemetery? Why? Her third husband was a Brigadier General and he died in a noncombat-related plane crash (in 1978) so he got the rights to that and as a spouse she eventually got a plot next to him as well. Imagine making your way among that vast tribute to the war dead and stumbling across where Maureen O’Hara has come to her Eternal Rest.
I think Miracle on 34th Street is a cruel movie because it sets the expectation for any kid believing in Santa (or Jesus) that really really big things are possible.
Something like The Santa Clause or Elf? Eh it’s just that Santa is real and Santa knows exactly which toy you want.
But a new big house! WOW! That’s like asking that your parent stops drinking or gets a new job or isn’t sad anymore.
(After Googling what being ratioed means) I do like the movie White Christmas. It had a special meaning for many WWII veterans, including my father. A Wonderful Life is too saccharine even for me. I like the original Miracle on 34th Street, the scenery is wonderful, as is what Macy’s parade used to look like. I’m not familiar with the other movies mentioned, aside from Lethal Weapon, so I will take your words for it on their worthiness.
Myo finally opened that word of the day calendar we gave him last Xmas! A little late dude!
I can’t believe that Ernest Saves Christmas doesn’t get any love on here.
I thought about it but my niece’s boyfriend looks like a young version of him & he has grown on me. Know what I mean Vern?
This is for Christmas movies we can’t stand – Ernest Saves Christmas is a gem!
And let us not forget this Christmas classic:
I once performed this in the role of George Clooney’s aunt with my then-boyfriend, who did not have Vera-Ellen’s famous 17″ waist, luckily, and we weren’t in drag, we just—well, you had to be there to get why we spontaneously did this. Very drunkenly, I might add, and not remembering every single word, but close enough. When you’re in college and you have no money you make your own fun.