Hi, friends! Happy Sunday! I hope your weekend is going well.
Topic of the night are small-scale situations of how are people so fucking stupid.
Case in point – local gardening group I’m in on the facebook had this lady post these pictures of clearly photoshopped plants she bought (Amazon listing) and the actual roots that got mailed to her from China. It would be unrealistic to the point of like seeing a live pine tree for sale that had Barbie pink needles.
The rootstock sent to her clearly had a big chunk of rotty moldy crap on it. Dozens of people were like oh just trim that off and plant it, it should be fine. A few people were like hey that’s clearly photoshopped but might as well plant it anyways. A couple of people said to plant it in a pot, just to be on the safe side. Finally I was like “HI MAYBE YOU SHOULDN’T JUST PLANT IN YOUR MISSOURI YARD RANDOM ROTTING SHIT YOU GOT MAILED FROM ANOTHER COUNTRY?????” Luckily a lot of people agreed with me and I think she’s not inclined to plant it now.
But like — if I can’t even fly from Honolulu to the mainland US with a few apples I bought from a grocery store because of risk of introduction of invasive species, I’m fairly positive that lady shouldn’t plant some unmarked shit that biologically can’t be what’s advertised in her yard.
Holy shit, we aren’t even allowed to take firewood from one county to the next here, because of Ash Borers. Not only she she not plant it she ought to maybe burn it along with the packaging.
Yeah other people weighed in and started pushing on her and I think she’s going to burn it. It was basically burn it or turn it in to your local agricultural extension office and they’re gonna wanna know why you were stupid enough to buy it.
I’m reminded of the mystery seeds from China.
https://modernfarmer.com/2021/02/usda-finds-mystery-seeds-from-china-were-not-sent-to-harm-american-agriculture/
Right! Except this dingbat paid $15 for something that looked completely unrealistic and had a 1 star review on amazon. Like at least the unsolicitied seeds weren’t people trying to be stupid and order dubious shit.
On my way home tonight a fucking stupid menace to society decided it would be a great idea to “be nice” and just STOP IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FUCKING ROAD so some other person could TURN LEFT. There is no stop sign there or any other indication that this stupid fucking old bat had any business putting every other driver at risk of a wreck, but she wanted to “be nice.” These are the kind of people that make me wish I was behind the wheel of a ‘38 Ford truck so I could floor it and ram her stupid fucking ass to let her see just how fucking dangerous that shit is.
I’m telling you right now that when I become king there are going to some fucking changes around here.
Yeah, those kind of “nice” drivers screw everything up when they have no situational awareness. They’re not pushing a shopping cart down aisle seven of the Shop ‘n’ Go.
A long time ago (mid–late-90s?) George Saunders published a short story about the introduction of a small invasive bug or animal and then to remedy the destruction a slightly larger living thing was introduced, which then creates its own problems, and so on, until THE END. I think this appeared in either The New Yorker or Harpers, and I think it appeared in a short story collection called Civilwarlandia Has Fallen on Hard Times or something like that.
It’s worth looking for if you can find it but I failed.
George Saunders is great. He used to be a weirdo Ayn Rand style libertarian but he eventually started feeling more and more like there was something wrong and changed his mind, and right around then is when he started writing.
I hear ya. Some previous owner of my next door neighbor’s house planted English ivy that was left unchecked by the previous owners of my house. It is sooo hard to get rid of – especially since we don’t use any pesticides or chemicals in the yard. To top it off – we now have kudzu growing in it. I swear that crap is sentient. I think I hear it scream every time I pull it up.
I’m pretty sure both english ivy and kudzu are like “yes, baby, do it again!” whenever you tear or trim it.
Those damn masochists.
We have English ivy, wild morning glory, horsetails, and this funny one that literally shoots its seeds when I pull at it. It’s not easy to keep any of them under control because we live on a steep ravine.
Today I had someone who wanted in the parking spot I was about to back out of wait for me to back out whilst stopped directly behind my car.
Do you even need to hear about the rest of this anecdote?
That’s a reason I usually park in the least popular part of a lot and hoof it.
OT: My 14 year old “stepdaughter” / “Protégé” suggested to someone that if they want to have an opinion about abortion maybe they should “cut off your dick and get a vagina.”
So proud.
Please give her a high five for me.
oh…..fairly sure my californian poppies and chinese lanterns are not native…..its fun watching where they pop up every year….. the poppies seem to have migrated to the front yard now
its okay tho….they are orange
the locals will never know they are imports