When Payaya Pol Pot threatened to send U.S troops into cities to quell riots on Monday, I started trying to write something about it several times. For the life of me I couldn’t muster the energy to come up with what I felt about Trump’s threats toward protestors. Until today, I didn’t understand why I was so unmoved by his threats.
Ultimately, though, I think it’s because he’s a coward.
I mean, he’s a certified wimp. And for some reason, I knew, I just knew that Trump wouldn’t be able to go through with it. And lo and behold, as of today, Wednesday, June 3rd, the 1,600 members of our armed forces who had been called to potentially police the streets of DC are now on their way back home.
This is because Trump has no actual ideas and no actual drive to act on anything but his most base impulses. Trump’s strongman threats were no different than when he threatened to withhold federal funds from states who withheld funds, or when he threatened to override states with stay-at-home orders requiring churches to stay closed. They weren’t actually ever going to be acted on. At worst, Trump couldn’t act on them if he tried, and at best, he’d get so bored with the nuances of taking such an action that he’d lose interest and go back to watching TV.
I mean, can you imagine Trump even sitting still long enough to learn the particulars of the Insurrection Act of 1908? Unless there were boobs in that briefing, and those boobs looked curiously like his daughter’s, there’s no way Mango Mussolini was going to even understand it, much less invoke it, in the same way he couldn’t be arsed to invoke the Defense Production Act until one of his supposed enemies annoyed him and he thought it’d be some petty revenge.
Trump is too much of a chicken shit to even admit that he ordered to have the protesters forcibly cleared out for his dumb, stupid, church-based photo op. That is Trump in a nutshell. People keep sounding alarm bells over Trump potentially refusing to leave office, but above all else, people need to realize that Trump is a coward, and he will never not be a coward. If and when Trump gets voted out, he’ll make a huge show about how he refuses to concede, and how he’s going to refuse to leave office and “VOTER FRAUD!!!” and threaten to file a lawsuit and blah blah blah, and then he’ll leave like a coward anyway, because he doesn’t have the guts or the balls to follow through with anything he says.
Trump is all surface level with no depth. See also; Trump’s bizarre attempts, in the midst of a pandemic and widespread civil unrest, deciding he’d like to shore up his polling numbers among evangelicals. Trump did all this for a 15 second Tim and Eric sketch where he posed with a bible, upside down no less. The next day, he and Melania “Don’t Feel Sorry for Her, She’s Fucking Complicit” Trump posed in front of a statue of Saint John Paul II at the National Shrine in Washington, D.C, looking exactly like people who wanted to be nowhere near a church.
Trump was immediately condemned by both the Episcopal Diocese of Washington and head of the Washington D.C archbishop Wilton Gregory, which has to be the first time in history that a President has been asked under no uncertain terms to not show up uninvited at a church. For literal, actual Christ’s sakes, even Pat Robertson has condemned Trump’s response to the protests.
As the unrest following George Floyd’s murder at the hands of a Minnesota cop goes into it’s second week unabated, Trump, as he is wont to do, is desperately trying to change the subject. Today on Satan’s favorite social media platform Twitter (which is unlike Hitler’s favorite platform Facebook), Trump tried to both stand up for law enforcement officers using force while also pointing out Biden’s role in the 1994 crime bill. Trump also spent the day trying to diffuse claims that he had gotten taken to an underground bunker amid protests outside the White House, claiming he was only looking it over for an “inspection”. Trump has also called for the Supreme Court to reconsider flag burning laws, because he doesn’t understand what free speech is. Trump also said that he’s done “more for our black population” than any President since Abraham Lincoln, and then went back to the well to start beef with Joe Scarborough again. He tried to revive the spooky specter of mail-in ballots been fraudulent on the same day it was found he tried to register as a voter in Florida with the White House’s address, which is illegal.
Trump is dying for something, anything he can grab with his tiny, tiny hands that he can feed to his base to get them fired up. Polls keep creeping up showing Trump trailing Biden or in toss-ups with him, and it’s hard to have any sort of policy agenda when you don’t know what “policy” or “an agenda” even is. Trump can only rile up the racists so long before he hits the law of diminishing returns.
If there’s one thing these protests have shown, it is that there really is more of us than there are of them.
Bravely Bunker Donald rode forth from (US Amercia’s) Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, O brave Bunker Don.
He was not at all afraid to be mocked in nasty ways,
Brave, brave, brave, brave Bunker Don!
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes tear gased and his neck crushed,
To be shot with rubber and his life drained away
And his head all broken and mangled, brave Bunker Don!
His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his bible—
Brave Bunker Don ran away,
Bravely ran away, away.
When the facts reared its ugly head, he bravely turned his tail and fled.
Yes, brave Bunker turned about
And gallantly, he chickened out. Bravely taking to his feet,
He beat a very brave retreat,
Bravest of the brave, Bunker Don!
/there wasn’t really much that needed to be changed/
I am not a brave man but Donald Trump makes me look like fucking Rambo. He is a coward’s coward.
I’m also not the bravest of persons, but I can at least admit when I’ve fucked up, and accept the repercussions of my fuckups without trying to throw everybody and their dog under the bus.
Other things I’ve done that our idiot president hasnt:
Although I quasi regret it, I was enlisted
I never declared bankruptcy
Never raped my wife (or anyone else)
Haven’t gold-plated my apartment
ETA: I’ve read more than one book
Okay, let’s be clear. Even with Ivanka’s boobs in a briefing, Trump wouldn’t understand anything that was being presented, much less the Insurrection Act. You might be able to get him to watch it to the end that way (I’m doubtful but maybe with enough Adderall) but he wouldn’t understand it, any more than a cocker spaniel understands what’s happening on a TV screen.
Now that that’s settled, yes. Trump’s one defining trait, even more than stupidity (and you can’t imagine how hard it is for me to say that) is cowardice. He’s the little kid that was bullied and grew up to be a bully, but when confronted, cries and curls up in a ball. I’ve said it before, but Trump is Scut Farkus in “A Christmas Story,” and his MAGAs are the cowardly and ultimately disillusioned toady Grover, multiplied several million times.
Trump losing Pat Robertson is the first glimmer of hope about the election I’ve had since Senator Warren was called the Front Runner. Clearly it has been a while.
“God told me to run for president” wrong
“God told me who the next president would be (through prayer)” wrong
“The towels (in Kenya) can have aids” wrong
“You just don’t do that Mr. President” and “it isn’t cool”
Wait. What?! It’s too late to save your rep, bud.
https://www.cnn.com/2020/06/03/politics/pat-robertson-donald-trump/index.html
wtf is happening to pat robertson? is he afraid his gop buddies will lose young evangelical votes?
Secretary Esper just canceled the order.
…fuck that dude & the horse he rode in on
What an asshole. He gave that press conference earlier contradicting the head asshole, so now he has lick his boots, I guess.
You have eased my concern over the possibility of Trump refusing to leave office, and for that I thank you. I’ve been assuming the worst since late 2016 because this timeline sucks, and a non-peaceful transfer of power was firmly in my third-worst outcome, post-election day (him winning a second term at the top spot; armed MAGA riots after his loss at #2). But I can’t argue your point that he’s always been 100% bluster to cover his chickenshit nature–so now I can fully enjoy gems like this: “Unless there were boobs in that briefing, and those boobs looked curiously like his daughter’s…”
You’re not the first to make that joke, I’m sure, but I don’t care one iota. Thank you.