Tuesday on the peninsula [DOT 15/3/22]

You've got to be shitting me.

Okay, as you all know, I am Deadsplinter’s Official Florida CorrespondentTM and as such, I have decreed that today’s DOT will be 100% Florida-centric. Let’s look at Florida’s … err … unique take on issues affecting both the nation and the world. Spoiler alert: We are on the wrong side of every. single. one. Including turtles.


Pandemic? Bullshit, says Florida Surgeon General!

After Democrats walk out of Ladapo confirmation hearing, Republicans unanimously support him
Democrats walked out of a confirmation hearing Wednesday for Florida Surgeon General Joseph Ladapo, saying he evaded questions about his approach toward the COVID-19 pandemic. Republicans then unanimously voted for the polarizing public health chief’s confirmation.

Senate Democratic Leader Lauren Book pressed Ladapo repeatedly to give a yes or no answer on whether vaccines are effective against COVID-19 at a meeting of the Health Policy Committee. Ladapo declined.

“Yes or no questions are not that easy to find in science,” he said. “… The most commonly used vaccines in the United States … have been shown to have relatively high effectiveness for the prevention of hospitalization and death and over time relatively low protection for infection.”

Book responded, “We get two buttons to push here, Dr. Ladapo. Yes or no. Do vaccines work in preventing COVID-19? Yes or no.”


You were raped? Get over it.

Florida Legislature votes to ban most abortions after 15 weeks
A ban on most abortions after 15 weeks of pregnancy is now headed to Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis, who is expected to sign it into law.

State senators voted 23-15 Thursday night in favor of the measure with no exceptions for rape or incest, an issue that spurred hours of emotional debate and protests.

Senate President Wilton Simpson predicted the measure, which opponents say is aimed at severely restricting abortion rights granted under the U.S. and Florida constitutions, would survive court review.

“For the first time in many years, you are going to have a bill that I believe will be tolerated in the U.S. Supreme Court,” Simpson said.


Of COURSE they approved it.

Florida lawmakers approve ‘don’t say gay’ bill; DeSantis expected to sign it

Florida lawmakers approved legislation known as the “don’t say gay” bill Tuesday, ignoring statewide protests and sending the contentious measure limiting classroom instruction on sexual orientation and gender identity to Gov. Ron DeSantis.

DeSantis has signaled that he will sign the bill into law, saying he thinks it will shield elementary-age children from inappropriate lessons about sex.

The legislation — titled Parental Rights in Education but dubbed by opponents the “don’t say gay” bill — bans classroom instruction on sexual orientation and gender identity in grades kindergarten through three.


Gas is REALLY expensive. What should we do?
If you answered “Spend stimulus money on a thinly-veiled attempt to curry favor with voters,” you’re RIGHT.
Florida lawmakers agree to 1-month gas tax break, right before governor’s election

Drivers in Florida could get some relief at the pump through a one-month, $200 million gas tax breakin October agreed to by state lawmakers Wednesday night.

The tax holiday would come a month before Gov. Ron DeSantis and many other politicians face re-election.

The gas tax plan, paid for with federal stimulus dollars sent to Florida because of the pandemic, emerged on a busy legislative day. 


Is DeSantis a Russian asset? Hey, I’m just asking questions.
Charlie Crist continues taunting Ron DeSantis over Russia, Ukraine

Democratic gubernatorial candidate Charlie Crist Thursday again denounced Gov. Ron DeSantis for not condemning Russia’s war on Ukraine or making statements of support for Ukraine.

Crist, a former Governor who currently serves in the U.S. House, charged that DeSantis is putting his partisan political ambitions ahead of supporting democracy. Crist argued DeSantis’ failure to sufficiently weigh-in is “unacceptable and unpatriotic.”

He also criticized DeSantis for not making moves to divest Florida investments from Russian assets, something first urged by Crist’s Democratic Primary Election opponent, Agriculture Commissioner Nikki Fried.

“It’s been a week since Russia’s bloody and unjust invasion of Ukraine began. A week of opportunities for Gov. DeSantis to make clear where he stands. It shouldn’t be hard,” Crist said.


Wait. Surely there’s something the Florida Legislature didn’t fuck up?
They’re working on it

Redistricting is one item of unfinished business. State lawmakers passed a congressional map that is expected to give Republicans an 18-10 advantage in Congress. DeSantis wanted the Legislature to go further and approve a map giving the GOP a 20-8 advantage.

He’s threatened to veto the Legislature’s map, meaning lawmakers will likely return to Tallahassee soon for a special session.

Voting rights groups have also sued, accusing DeSantis of overstepping his authority by intervening and asking for the courts to intervene.

DeSantis’ map would wipe away two Black-held congressional seats, including the one held by Central Florida’s U.S. Rep. Val Demings.


The actual fuck?
Florida boaters rescue sea turtle entangled in US flag

Three boaters came to the rescue of a struggling sea turtle entangled in a US flag in the waters off the coast of South Florida.

[Christian] Amor said he and his friends Sergio Berben and Eddie Torres got closer, only to realize it was a sea turtle in trouble and struggling to survive.

“Its back flipper was stuck between the flagpole and the actual flag itself, and it couldn’t get out, so it was struggling to come up for air,” he said.

“What I would like to think is, [the flag] was on a boat, and somehow it got loose, versus someone, you know, maybe it was cracked, and someone just said, ‘Oh, whatever,’” Amor said. “I would like to think it was an accident, but it was still in one piece, so I’m not 100% sure.”


Well, there you have it, my dear Deadsplinterati. Honestly, if the other 49 states decided to build a wall from Jacksonville to Panama City, I … really couldn’t blame you.

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29 Comments

  1. Dear Aggressive Fuckstick In a pickup truck,

    Sorry I didn’t do a left turn fast enough to satisfy your needs.  Sorry I saw the asshole coming the other way was driving without lights (not even sunrise right now.)

    I’m glad I’m not a weak spineless wimp like you who reacts because some fuckstick like you is upset I’m taking my fucking time with a left turn due to on coming traffic instead of acting the way you wanted me to.  By rushing a left turn so I’d end up smacking into an on coming asshole (without lights) and ruining both my day and his (but not yours, eh fuckstick?)

    But you weren’t aggressive when you saw that car flash past you and then you backed off my ass. Quite easy to be a demanding horn blasting aggressive asshole when it’s not your ass who would have gotten plowed by on coming traffic now is it, you fucking limp dick wimp?

    I can decide better than you ever could when I fucking turn left or not.

    Go fuck yourself.

    MC

  2. Today’s pet language peeve: “a whole nother.”  I even saw “a nother” in a comment section this morning.  I mean, I had to override autocorrect just to type that, FFS.

    • I LOVE that phrase!🤣

      Apologies for the irritation, because I KNOW I’ve used it around here before!(😖😱💖)

      Once in a great while, though, it’s just the perfect phrase for conveying a particular thought, and it can fit a specific place/locality’s state of mind…

      Kinda like there are times when ya need to break out a German or Japanese word for something, because you want to convey *that exact thing* that we don’t really have a proper (and exact!) term for in English.

    • Lemmy, I like “a whole nother” because as far as I could tell in a linguistic anthropology class, English is one of the crappy boring languages that doesn’t use infixes, with the notable exception of shoving “fucking” into words for emphasis.

      Absofuckinglutely I feel like a whole nother is the closest thing we have to a second infix in the English language.

      • The lettuce, funded by more than 1,000 individual donations, is offered to manatees that gather in the warm water discharge near a power plant on Florida’s east coast…

        Emphasis mine. That can’t be good for them in the long run. Unless they acquire super powers from the power plant.

        • Supposedly the water doesn’t come into contact with radioactive elements. But I’m not planning to swim there.

          The bigger problem is habituating the manatees to handouts. Once they get used to regular feedings, it’s gonna be hard to wean them off of them. There was fierce debate over it, but it came down to “What’s the alternative? Let them all die?” Which is impossible to refute.

        • That Nuke Plant Discharge thing is why Monticello in MN (a northwestern exurb of Minneapolis/St. Paul) has the Trumpeter Swans

          They don’t really hang out at the park/in the river during the daytime hours, but from twilight until shortly after daybreak, they gather on the river because of the warm water.

          There was a lady (mentioned in the story) who used to feed them–which is why Swan Park happened & got that name. Evidently the city discontinued the feeding in 2020, but there ARE still swans that stay up there all winter (I know, because I saw & heard them when I stopped at the Monti Fleet Farm back in December & January, getting some things for Dad!😉)

           

          Here’s more on the Swans, how they got started, and what’s happened since the 70’s, when the first ones were released;

          https://bringmethenews.com/news/swan-lady-legacy-lives-on-a-third-of-trumpeter-swans-winter-in-monticello

           

           

    • Oh, yes. Rick Scott’s Cliffs Notes version of Mein Kampf. The only positive about it is how it clearly illustrates his desperation. The GOP favors Trump > DeSantis > anybody else > Rick Scott. His criminal looting of Medicare is a nonstarter — Dems outside Florida would crucify him. Dems inside Florida are too busy tying their shoelaces together and falling on their faces, which is how Scott got to be Governor.

      It’s actually pitiful how Scott thinks that going ultra-right is the way to win votes. I assure you threatening old people in Florida with taxes will NOT earn you votes.

    • Stone has been credibly linked to a number of sex clubs, and I think it’s probable that he was a client for the Greenberg/Gaetz sex ring. I think in the initial stages Stone feared that one of them had compromising evidence on his participation, so he tried to wrangle a pardon. When that pardon attempt fell apart, I think Stone just held his breath and hoped nobody took any pictures. He might still get snagged, though. The Feds are notoriously close-mouthed about investigations.

      I’ve said for a long time that there are a LOT of other Republican political figures involved in this. 

      • Greenberg has been reported as having screenshotted encrypted texts with Stone which were set to be auto-deleted. I wouldn’t be surprised if he had a lot of info he was bargaining with for a plea deal. But I’m also guessing prosecutors are wary about what evidence Stone or others might pull out of their cloud accounts to discredit prosecution witnesses. But it’s hard to see the balance of collateral damage benefitting the GOP right now if things start coming to light.

      • Stone’s been known as a swinger for years.

        There’s nothing wrong with that (and there are tons of folks in that lifestyle who aren’t predators and who would NEVER have anything to do with the predation of minors!!!).

        But in Roger Stone’s case? I wouldn’t be surprised at all to discover predation. The man has been friendly with Trump for decades.

        Epstein was friends with Trump…. probably ‘ol Dodgy-Rodgy, too…. Epstein was originally busted in Florida years ago, but got that sweetheart deal that let him off the hook with a tiny sentence…

        Then there’s the Stone/Gaetz thing.

        But something I am not seeing any major reporting on yet, is whether or not there are ties between Gaetz/Stone et.al, and the Anton “Tony” Lazarro sex-trafficking case…

        Tony Lazzaro and a few “friends” of his (so far women!), have been busted for trafficking minors across state lines–similar to Gaetz and his buddies.

        Personally?

        I find it difficult to believe, that multiple ambitious young Republican men & women–both Fundraisers and Politicians wouldn’t know each other & be on “friendly” terms (at minimum!)

        Gaetz is 41-ish, Lazarro is 30-31, Jennifer Carnahan is 45-46, the young woman who was charged with trafficking girls younger than herself was 19.

        Some links (apologies if I already linked them-i had to take Lily to the urgent care vet this morning and started this comment before we got in, and I’m pretty sure I’ll lost it if I toggle back & forth to check!);

        https://www.kare11.com/article/news/crime/co-defendant-in-lazzaro-sex-trafficking-case-gisela-castro-medina-makes-first-mn-court-appearance/89-179282c2-4691-47ff-a208-1a2c7a8fca99

        https://bringmethenews.com/minnesota-news/gold-private-jets-and-ferraris-arrested-gop-strategist-anton-lazzaros-high-flying-lifestyle

        https://www.thedailybeast.com/gop-strategist-anton-lazzaro-arrested-for-underage-sex-trafficking

        https://www.miamiherald.com/topics/jeffrey-epstein

         

         

        • More on the ties between Carnahan and Lazaro…

           

          Apparently she believes she’s been out of the limelight long enough, that the stench of her actions as Republican Party Chair won’t completely tank her chances???

          My guess is that she’s planning to run on the “Poor grieving widow!” angle, annnnnd her “But I’m a WOC *and* an Asian-American WOC, at that, so I have no power or privilege!!!” shtick again.🙄🙄🙄

          Carnahan’s a lot like Lauren Boebert, in her use of/weaponization of, “But I’m a cool girl, I hang out with the guys, because other girls are alllllways catty and mean to me!!!”

          She’s very much a “cool girl”, from everything I’ve read about her, or heard from her in interviews over the years. She’s one of those R-side women who’s learned to use the Right’s misogyny both to help herself advance in her career & positions of/access to power, and to push out/away any woman/women she sees as a threat to her position & access.

          The Michael Broadkorb quote in the Politico article below is interesting as a Minnesotan, ‘cuz Broadkorb himself was previously a MNGOP “mover & shaker” and major fundraiser.

          Until the local news folks discovered that he and the then Chair of the MNGOP–The purported “Party of Family Values!”—and the same party which was in the midst of running a multi-million-dollar campaign for an amendment to the State Constitution that would have outlawed any marriage which wasn’t “Between One Man and One Woman”– were actively having an affair while both of them were married with families…

          and multiple staffers KNEW about the affair, because they did most of their rendezvous-ing at the capital & in Amy Koch’s office…

          Iirc, Koch was the last woman in a high-ranking GOP position in MN, until Carnahan came along.

          And the R’s really won’t want to have all the bullshittery, scandal, and the cost of the settlements brought back up & becoming DFL rallying points during this year’s election cycle.

          Because this election cycle isn’t *just* the redistricting year…

          In MN, this cycle is also the one where all our statewide races are decided; Governor & Lieutenant Gov., Secretary of State, Attorney General, Auditor & Treasurer.

          Theoretically, R’s would have a major advantage this cycle–because of the Pandemic-with a DFL Governor currently in office, the fact that the President is a D, and because before Walz was elected we had 8 years/2 terms of DFL’er Mark Dayton as Governor…

          But if Carnahan is on the ballot in November?

          It’s as likely to cause a huge scandal, as would’ve happened in the 2018 election (when all the DFL’ers currently in those posts were elected,), if Al Franken hadn’t resigned back in January like he did.

          In ’18, the MNGOP was desperately hoping Al would stay & fight for his name–knowing they could then take most of the statewide seats, because everyone on the DFL side of the ballot would be tarred by association…

          Broadkorb knows that the GOP hypocrisy (the affair, the lies that “we had no idea about the affair!”, AND the investigation & settlement money (both public AND GOP Party money) would kill  the chances of eletion-night wins for R’s up and down the ballot. 

          The same money & “bankruptcy” that Carnahan takes credit for getting the MNGOP *out* of (ironically!) from 2011-12 is currently *largely forgotten* but that it’ll roar up like a freight train, if Carnahan is back on the ballot🤔😏😈

          Links;

          https://www.politico.com/news/2022/03/11/house-gop-hagedorn-widow-seat-00016375

          https://www.mprnews.org/story/2012/06/20/brodkorb-sex-scandal-costs-trouble-senators

          https://www.huffpost.com/entry/amy-koch-affair-michael-brodkorb_n_1348773

          https://patch.com/minnesota/edenprairie/bp–brodkorb-fallout-consider-the-source

          https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2012_Minnesota_Amendment_1#:~:text=Minnesota%20Amendment%201%20(also%20called,rejected%20by%2051.90%25%20of%20voters.

           

           

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