Why is cauliflower?

I thought we could take a break from our living nightmare to fight about food.

Cauliflower is the ghost of broccoli and it haunts us all.

I don’t hate cauliflower. It’s fine. It’s like how I don’t hate a white t-shirt. However, I cannot, for the life of me, figure out why anyone would choose cauliflower over any other vegetable.

It tastes like whatever you put on it. You people are going to put all these recipes in the comments, explain to me how yummy they are, and all of them would work exactly fine on another vegetable – and bonus points, that vegetable would have flavors!

Don’t try to change my mind. I know you’re wrong.



  1. it is simply a butter recepticle

    • Yes. But there are so many! (FYI I deleted a duplicate comment of yours, not sure if it notified you or not but that’s what it is if it did).

    • Unless it is a vehicle for cheese (and it ALWAYS is!😉😁)

  2. I used to eat cauliflower, either raw or cooked…until The Rotten Cauliflower Incident of 1992. Never again.

    • I had an eggplant incident.

      • In our house it was the Great Tomato Soup Incident of 1998.

      • I used to absolutely despise eggplant until my wife showed me the Light and the Truth. You have to slice them SUPER THIN, egg wash them and then dip them in seasoned rice flower before frying them to golden brown. Then, immediately dip them in warm marinara and eat. Heaven.

  3. I agree, cauliflower is the seat filler, space in line keeper of the vegetable world. and thus deserves all of the anger one can heap upon it.

    • I don’t even think it’s controversial enough to deserve anger!

  4. You are correct. Cauliflower has no reason to exist. It is flavorless, colorless, and purposeless.

    Oh, and the next motherfucker that tries to tell me that “mashed cauliflower” should be a thing is getting a ladle of gravy up the ass.

    • “a ladle of gravy up the ass.” Oh reallllllllly

    • Cauliflower gravy? 0_o

    • Look at the big kink on QF

  5. I tried to like cauliflower, because it’s healthy I guess. I ate it riced – blah. I ate it as gnocchi – ick. I baked it in a pie with broccoli and cheese – it tasted like broccoli and cheese. The only way I liked it was battered, fried,and covered in Buffalo wing sauce. At that point it’s no longer good for me so why bother?

    • Yeah I mean…I am a little bit lucky in that I like healthy food just fine and am a good cook, and I don’t need to cauliflower-ify things like pizza crust because I’d rather just eat real pizza infrequently than bastardize it. I guess if you’re starting from a place where you eat pizza several times a week, it’s good to attempt a cauliflower crust (insert whatever food people have been cauliflowering in place of pizza and it stands).

      My favorite (least favorite), is that every so often the vegetarian option on a menu is a cauliflower steak while everyone else gets a cut of meat, and I’m like GET SOME FUCKING PROTEIN IN THAT MEAL!

  6. You are out of your mind! The best food things are ones that taste like nothing so you can choose what they taste like with various spanfellers and spices!

    …and aloo gobi is awesome!

    • That’s what tofu is for. Cauliflower is superfluous.

    • I was going to give a shout out to aloo gobi but you beat me to it.

      One of the things it has going for it is the texture, which is still just a bit crunchy in aloo gobi and goes well with the softer potatoes.

  7. Unless it is a vehicle for cheese (and it ALWAYS is!😉😁)

  8. As a recepticle for buffalo sauce or Korean barbeque sauce, I say.

    But aloo gobi is the real answer. It may be the only legitimate answer to your question.

    • Yeah I can’t refute aloo gobi. But there are so many other more pleasurable things to put buffalo or Korean bbq sauce on…

  9. I will say that at one point I had some sushi in which the rice was replaced by riced cauliflower, and it was… pretty good, actually. I’d eat it again.

    Otherwise, yes it’s just aggressively “fine”.

    • I’m not sure I believe you about that sushi….

  10. It can easily replace rice and mashed potatoes in a low carb diet. And it’s excellent as those things.

    • I will ONLY agree with you in a mashed potatoes situation.

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