Wild Wild Life [NOT 22/6/21]

22/6/21 Hannibal 64

Friends don’t use friends as bear bait, is the National Park Service advice on what not to do when you encounter a bear in the wild, “do not push a slower friend down…even if you feel the friendship has run its course,” park rangers said.” It doesn’t say anything about family members, so use your best judgment there. I spent a lot of time camping in my younger days and have seen bears and other creatures in the wild. Including an uncomfortably close meeting with a mother bear and cubs in Shenandoah National Park. We stayed still and quiet, and they moved off in another direction. My favorite wildlife sighting was a porcupine. I was in a canoe, and it was on the bank of the creek, close enough that I could have reached out and touched it. I was surprised by how large it was. It seemed as curious about me as I was of it. It was so cute, I wanted to stop and make friends, but my companions didn’t think that was a good idea. Share your wildlife experiences, Deadsplinters.

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64 Comments

  1. Jesus, as much time as I have spent in AK and in National Parks generally, I’ve never in my life heard about people pushing other people down to get away from a bear.  W.  T.  F.

    I’ve had a fair amount of wildlife experiences, but one that comes to mind is when some co-workers and I spotted a cow moose with her calf grazing in the leaching field of the employee housing area.  They were probably…30 or 40 yards apart, but it was an open area so no big deal for mother moose.  We all stayed in a small copse of trees watching them.  Then, we spotted another co-worker walking on the path towards us from the other side of the field—which would have taken him directly between the mother and her calf.  We couldn’t make any loud noises because there was no way to predict how the moose would react, so we had to quietly wave our arms around like crazy from the trees to get his attention.  He spotted us just as he was about to enter the field and stopped.  Then we pointed to the mother and calf and he just started to back up very slowly.  If he hadn’t spotted us it would have been…ugly.

    • I don’t think they’re serious. It’s a take on the old joke about not having to be faster than the bear, just faster than your friend. 
      I have relatives who live in Alaska, they’ve told me how dangerous moose are, your coworker was very lucky! That must have been cool to watch the mother and her calf.

    • I’ve had a few close encounters w/ moose in Alaska, the worst being when we separated a mother from her calf while snowmobiling.  We were super calm and she didn’t charge but my cousins pulled out guns just in case.  Luckily it didn’t come to that, I really didn’t want to see that!  We actually had one other close encounter when a moose ran behind me and in front of my friend’s ATV while on a trail near the Matanuska glacier.   


  2. When I was on summer break just before going to university, my parents decided to take the family on one last camping trip.  We went camping with our Doxie.  During dinner, my dad decided to cook some Kalbi (Korean short ribs) on the hibachi which attracted the attention of the Doxie who loved BBQ.  She sat on the bench sniffing the cooking meat.  It was then I noticed she wasn’t the only one sniffing at the wonderful smells.  A black bear teen was about ten feet away from the cooking tent doing the same thing.
    Our doxie was a typical doxie in that she was brave and stupid when it came to protecting the family.  She regularly charged/chased dogs/animals three four times her size without fear.  I scooped her up before she knew the bear was there and shoved her in the car before she would have attacked the bear.
    The bear sniffed around for about an hour before a Ranger showed up to scare the bear off.  Meanwhile our Doxie was barking fiercely at the bear in the car.  My mom and sister also jumped into the car.
     
     

  3. A late story about my friend and former housemate on a hiking trip to Algonquin Park.
    It was a clusterfuck of a trip which ended when I severely sprained my ankle trying to cross a bog.  The worst was we ended up splitting up on the trail because some folks (read my former housemate) weren’t prepared for the rain and had to get their gear from the car.
    My friend made the mistake of trusting the former housemate who can’t read a map to save his life.  At a fork in the trial instead of going left, they went right.  They ended up getting lost and realized they went the wrong way about 10km into the trail.  Meanwhile it started raining a lot.
    My friend was pissed at the former housemate.  He knew they didn’t have a lot of daylight left and had to trek some 20+ km to get to the campsite.  My friend ended up walking far ahead of the former housemate.  As he stopped to get his bearings, a male moose appeared out of nowhere.  They stared at each other for a moment before the moose took off into the bush.
    My friend said that was the highlight of the trip for him because like everyone else (especially me) we were miserable.
    On the same trip we were also attacked in the middle of the night by a scared Pug.  I ended up hiking back two miles in the middle of the night to bring the scared dog back to his/her stupid owners (who fired off bear bangers after getting drunk and stoned which scared the dog stupid.)

    • Oh wow. A lost dog in bear country. I hope they were grateful, you most likely saved its life. My daughter was working in the field and someone left a tiny puppy in box. She and her coworkers found the little guy who barely had his eyes open. They bought milk and eye droppers and kept it in their motel rooms during the week, feed and caring for it. One of the men took it home. 
      I’ve never seen a moose. Hopefully one day, from a safe distance.

      • They weren’t, but that was no shock to me as they were also squatting in the campsite we had booked (because of the bad weather they refused to leave, assholes.)
        I felt bad for the dog to have assholes for owners.
        Moose are impressive, but mean as hell.  At a Scouts meeting, I heard one farmer tell the story how he got attacked by one in the middle of the night on a country road.  He said to all us gawking kids that he saw the moose in the middle of the road, the moose glared at him, lowered his head and attacked the truck.  Due to the incredible strength of its skull, the truck lost when its front end was crushed while the moose had a pretty bad headache.
         

      • Also, another friend went on a canoe trip and they spotted a male moose on the shore eating.  They took a bunch of photos of it. 
        As this was before the age of digital photography, when they got the photos developed they realized they got photos of a male moose pissing and taking a shit.

  4. Well, alligators, of course. I think people don’t realize there are 1.25 million alligators in Florida. The human population is something over 20 million, so that’s one alligator for every 18-20 people. Now, those of us who are used to it don’t get excited, but I don’t think there’s another state that has that high a population of predatory carnivores. 
     
    They’re largely nocturnal and scared of people, so as long as you don’t feed them and get them habituated to people, they’ll stay away from you. But people are stupid and think it’s cool to feed the wildlife, right up until somebody dies. We just had the five-year anniversary of the child who was killed in an alligator attack at Disney. Turns out the idiots at the Reedy Creek fire station were feeding the gators there. Sorry, took a dark turn there. 
     
    https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2016/07/14/report-disney-world-firefighters-reprimanded-for-feeding-gators-in-months-before-deadly-attack-on-toddler/
     

    • On my family’s trip to the Everglades it was pretty astonishing how many alligators there are just lying around in the water. They didn’t care at all about the people watching, but you could see by their teeth that could seriously mess you up if you crossed them. It’s pretty amazing that people do.

      • This one wasn’t the family’s fault. We got plenty of other idiots, though, so I know what you mean. This time it was Disney’s fault and they wrote those people a VERY large check. To their credit the family set up a charitable foundation in the boy’s name.
         
        The rule here is that every single body of water large enough to hold a gator actually holds a gator. Retention ponds, sewage culverts, drainage ditches, just assume that every one of them has a gator in it. But you can’t expect that family to know that, and Disney didn’t have proper fencing or other barriers around the beach (which is weird considering all that stuff is artificial). And of course you had the dumbfuck firefighters who fed the damn gators, teaching them that seeing humans means dinnertime. Disney basically admitted fault without even attempting to resort to legal action. 
         
        Also, gators almost never attack something larger than they are on shore. Small dogs, cats, possums, raccoons, they go for that stuff but people are too big if they’re standing on land. “Almost” being the operative word. They might go for you in the water if you’re dumb enough to swim at night, because they are mostly nocturnal and sleep during the day. But I haven’t swum in a Florida lake in over 18 years now, and don’t plan to do it again. Forget the gators; I’m terrified of the amoebas. 

  6. We had another deer on my block a couple of days ago, the second in a month, this one a buck with the antlers just starting to come in. I live in a big city, near big roads, and this guy was just grazing away on the lawn across the street. It’s kind of cool, but I really don’t want to lose my plants.

          • nothing too impressive.  I’ve seen moose and elk and black bears, usually from a distance.
            Here’s my scariest stories, for lochaber values of scary…
            Was on a Geology weekend field trip, staying at a park.  I forget the whole situation leading up to this, but some other people were less well equipped, or maybe something unexpected happened, but I gave up my tent, and just curled up in my sleeping bag by the fire.  At some point in the night, I woke up, the fire was down to coals, and I looked over, and there was a skunk.  I just froze, and I didn’t even breathe for what seemed like ~5 minutes, until the skunk wandered off.  Then I took a breath, but still didn’t move for another couple minutes.  When I was fairly certain it had left the area, I piled all the wood on the fire, and curled up inside my sleeping bag and tried to forget I exist.
            Some time back, took a road trip to Alaska.  was driving through a remote part of British Columbia (possibly Yukon?), late at night, and saw a house cat wander out into the road.  So, I slowed down, and thought it was odd seeing a house cat out here so far from any signs of civilization.  As I got closer, I thought it looked pretty big for a housecat…  And then, I got close enough I had to pretty much stop, and it turned and stared at us, and I realized it wasn’t a housecat.  tufted ears, mean as hell looking, and it just stared our car down.  I rolled up my window and patiently waited for it to go away.
            Lived in the Mojave for a bit, and would sometimes encounter rattle snakes.  Usually they rattle, I freeze, figure out where they are, and then back off a bit, and either let them go on there way, or I give them a wide berth if they are just sitting still.  Was jogging after dark, and because everything sucks around there, the road surface was frequently obscured in shadow, but there were bright enough lights in the distance to kill my nightvision or make everything invisible due to contrast.  Going at a pretty good speed, and just ahead of me, way to close for me to stop, I hear a rattle.  So I just jumped as hard as I could, and then jumped again, and sprinted for a short while.  Not dead/didn’t get bit by a snake, so I guess that worked?
            Skunks scare me more than any other creature I’ve encountered in the wilderness (or Downtown Berkeley… I kept running into skunks on my way home from bars there…)  I realize they probably won’t kill me, but will very likely make me wish they had…

            • @lochaber I’ve seen more skunks and raccoons growing up in the suburbs than I ever did camping or hiking. I’ve seen Eastern Rattlers and I don’t really like snakes so I didn’t enjoy that. When I briefly lived in the country we had foxes that would hang out on our property. They’d play together like dogs, it was fun to watch. 

            • I think it’s related to the term lecherous?  so I suspect lech.
              I think I first learned that from a tabletop RPG…  GURPS maybe?  I think it was a disadvantage – it was a point system, where you could spend points to raise stats (strength, intelligence, etc.) or learn skills, and you could take disadvantages that would give you extra points.  I think lecherous was one of them, and you basically had to try to hit on/sleep with everyone you encountered of the gender you were attracted to…

  8. …I’ve seen a few critters her & there on land or in water that have been impressive (to me at any rate) but I think in terms of up close there’s really one time that has the others beat?

    …a lot of years ago on a family holiday we were in a boat on a tidal loch…which anywhere outside of scotland is a lake that’s connected somewhere to the sea…somewhere underground so it’s still a lake but one filled with saltwater that has tides…anyway, said boat had an outboard & the loch was big enough that we’d gone a fair way when the damn thing packed up…so my poor father was stuck rowing us all the way back…it took a while

    …being to small at the time to be much good for taking a turn at the oars I wound up lying with my head in the bow & my arms trailing in the water…it was a hot day & it seemed a good way to feel a little cooler…or at least it did until a seal came up right under my palm & pushed my hand up like it was a party trick…it didn’t do a somersault or any of that seaworld stuff but it did come up fast enough to launch itself out of the water so the whole thing was plenty spectacular enough to give me the shock of my life (at least up to that point, anyway)

    …& it must have meant to…because if it had thought my fingers were some sort of fish there’s no way that hand wouldn’t have been in its jaws before I knew it was there instead of butted out of the water…I bet it thought it was funny, too…not sure I could have said the same at the time?

  9. I personally have no wild animal stories.  But, I have several Alaskan coworkers. One snaps photos of huge moose cleaning out the autumn leftovers from her garden. Another tells of dodging moose in her driveway. The saddest story was one telling how they had to walk out of the Revenant, because “we’ve lost three friends to bear attack, and couldn’t stand the bear scenes”.

  10. I’m late to the party but I have a couple of them – 
    – One time when I was hiking with my dog on the Old Mulholland Fire Road outside of LA – we ran into a baby mountain lion on the trail. We were about 2 miles away from my car. Luckily, my dog didn’t notice it until after I tightened my grip on her leash – she lunged, but I had a good hold of her – we never saw mama – but I spent the entire way back yelling loudly in all directions and throwing rocks everywhere I heard a sound. Never went back there to hike. 
    – Another time – some friends and I were camping with my same dog from above – in the middle of the night we got swarmed by a pack of coyotes. Some of them were actually attacking the tent – I was literally laying on my dog who was pretty big(Black Lab/Great Dane mix) so she wouldn’t attack back. After some well placed kicks – we got them to give up and leave. I don’t advocate that kind of violence but we didn’t know what else to do.
    – Another camping trip – we had a bear come into the camp in the middle of the night. We had hiked into the sight and  hung our bags up in the trees – so it tried to get to them – but they were too high. It wandered around a little while but luckily didn’t pay any attention to the tents. Only me and one other guy were awake. I don’t know how big the actual bear was – but silhouetted in the moonlight from in the tent – it looked huge. It was nerve wracking, but ended up okay. If it had attacked or someone else had woken up and freaked out – I’m not sure what we would have done. 
    – And, filming in Wilmington, NC – we would film exteriors at this plantation  that was on the waterway. The gators would stay just on the periphery of the lights in the condors(cherry pickers). You could shine your flashlight into the dark beyond and sometimes there would be  a hell of a lot of red eyes glowing back at you. When we would wrap and the lights would start being shut down – you could hear the gators moving in closer and closer. We also had gator spotters when we were near the water – they would be in john boats with shot guns. 
     

    • @Lymond Those are some pretty scary encounters. I’m surprised by the coyote attack. I’ve been in the woods and heard them at night, some very close but they never came up to the tent. 

      • @Hannibal @Lochaber –  There were a lot of them. I really think they smelled and wanted my dog. We didn’t get out of the tent until they were long gone – it could’ve been a pack of wild dogs but they sounded like coyotes. We had heard them earlier but thought they were pretty far off. I can’t remember where we were – we went on a lot of camping excursions in California – and usually they were pretty remote because I didn’t like to camp around other people. 

    • @ Hannibal
      -I’m also surprised by the coyote attack, they tend to be pretty timid/cautious.  I almost wonder if it was maybe a stray dog pack or similar?  I also feel that coyotes are more often solo?
      (not questioning what you experienced @Lymond, more just trying to guess at a  possible “why”)
      And if they are attacking your tent, well they could use a boot/heel to the snoot.  It likely won’t cause them permanent harm, and that behavior should be discouraged…

  11. Pre-pandemic my neighborhood had a lot of hawks. They used to be pretty common in Manhattan, but especially near parks. If you were on my building’s roof you’d often see at least one swooping gracefully.

    Hawks like to catch pigeons mid-air, or zoom down and pick up rats (or other moving creatures), and eat while in-flight. 

    STOP READING IF YOU’RE SQUEAMISH

    They don’t swallow their prey whole, they bite off a mouthful and whatever’s left drops back to earth and they go for that if they can. I’ve seen this more than once. 

    A few years ago I was on the roof looking at some hawks with a neighbor and she said, “And the grossest thing is that about a year ago I was crossing the street right outside this building and part of a hawk’s meal landed on my head and my left shoulder. Luckily the hawk didn’t come for me next!”

    I would have burned my clothes, soaked in a tub for at least 24 hours, and not have left the building for a week. My neighbor was made of sterner stuff. 

    • relatively recently, I saw some sort of raptor (hawk? falcon? eagle? idunno….) nab a mourning dove midflight, and it was pretty impressive.
      I forget why, but for some reason the dove had caught my attention, and I was watching it, and completely oblivious to the raptor.  So, I’m just watching this dove fly, and then all of a sudden, the raptor drops into my field of vision, collides with the dove with an audible “whump” (I had to be at least a good 100yds/m away…), there is an almost comical puff of feathers, and then the raptor flew off to a strand of trees.  (where I’m assuming it found a nice spot to consume it’s meal…)

    • I forgot to mention my 120-lb. dog’s greatest nemesis, The Mockingbird. I haven’t seen it for a while but it used to nest nearby, I guess. On our dawn walks for one week twice a year it would swoop down and flap its wings in his face and screech in his ear(s). He was terrified of it. During these times I would have to gather papers with which to shoo it away. All the dog-owning neighbors knew this avian neighbor.

      Our guess is that this bird was a she whose eggs had just hatched and she was on a foraging mission but also able to detect possible non-human predators. This was during the hawks/pigeons/rodents era. She (if the mockingbird was a mother) vanished along with the rest of them. The rodents are making a slow comeback now that things have opened up more and maybe will come the flying wildlife.

  12. Ewww, lol. I didn’t know they did that. I would have been hysterical and needed a sedative.

    We have a lot of hawks here too. And eagles and vultures. The vultures are becoming a bit of a problem by acting aggressively towards people. That’s not really typical behavior from them so it is concerning. They’ll hiss at you on the sidewalk. One flew out of the dumpster at my daughter’s apartment building when day when she took out the trash. And hissed at her. 

    • You might have witnessed something like this yourself. Have you ever been to a beach town, strolling along a boardwalk and eating a cheesy fry or a funnel cake, and seen a lot of seagulls? They will swoop in and pluck food out of people’s hands, circle around eating it, and come back for more. It’s very Hitchcock. I used to be part of a beach house and the town had boardwalk restaurants with outdoor seating. Sometimes their decks/patios were closed because the local gull population was being particularly aggressive.

  13. My friend lives in Colorado and has a trail cam on his property, he is always sending me pics of bears and foxes and stuff. Of course they’re grainy “Unsolved Mysteries” lookin, but still cool.
    When my dad, uncles, and cousins were on a fishing trip in Canada, one cousin decided to stay up late, tend to the fire, and generally chillax. There was a blueberry bush near the cabin. At some point a mom bear with two cubs rolls up and gets within feet of him, but on the other side of the fire. He doesn’t see it until she snorts. He arrived on the porch at the speed of light to start banging pots and pans, waking everyone.
    My only wildlife encounters are that which occur in suburbia. The occasional coyote, but mostly birds, chipmunks, squirrels, and rabbits. The latter two are my fave since they know my garden is a safe space so they come snorking around for seeds and berries, then I get to see cute antics. 
     
    squirrel and boggs
     
     
     

  14. I’ve seen a reasonable number of wild animals over the years (mostly bears here in the Adirondacks) but the one that really, truly got me was one I can’t see locally: An otter! I saw one in the wild while traveling and I was totally gobsmacked. I could have just sat and watched it go all day. 

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